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(11/07/13 3:35am)
The Badger Herald’s recent letter-to-the-editor “'Rape culture' does not exist” further proves the University of Wisconsin- Madison’s preeminent ego-inflamed, aggressively misogynistic, notorious “semi celebrity” David Hookstead unsurprisingly doesn’t harbor the capacity to understand the concept “rape culture.” There has already been an onslaught of backlash in response to his column—appalled voices furiously speaking against what is clearly a gross rhetorical misrepresentation of the truth on a core level. All anger toward this abomination is totally warranted. But my response here is not intended to insult or belittle Hookstead as a person (social media can take care of that). All I’m going to do is explain why his claim is wrong.
(11/01/13 4:36am)
Upon observing the uber-rad tendencies of their remarkably in-vogue (let’s be honest, hipper) classmates, literal hordes of University of Wisconsin-Madison students frantically purchased pocket-sized Moleskine journals Wednesday evening.
(10/31/13 3:34am)
Wooo, how about those midterms? I bet they were so fun! Anyway, while you were all studying, I was busy compiling a list of new (and very important and very useful and very funny, goddamnit) words for you all to use in your post-failure, or whatever, worlds. Thank me after your once irreconcilably stagnant daze of an existence is immediately turned up by these boss ways to define ur lyfe.
(10/24/13 6:09am)
School is a lot of money.
(10/24/13 3:40am)
Listen: Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Don’t believe me? Hahaha, lolol, well, damned if you do and damned if you don’t.
(10/17/13 2:24am)
Ode to the students of no joy (or anything near happiness—a thing every human should value above prestige, which is a fleeting beacon of false security)
(10/10/13 4:27am)
All you health food junkies, environmentalists, activists against obesity, et al., need to stfu. McDonald’s is a blessing. If you don’t appreciate it, there is something broken in your head (probably because you’ve been too busy nibbling on kale and cat food instead of a Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese like a real American).
(10/03/13 2:34am)
This column is going to be something I’ve never tried before. Normally, I’m a pretty careful writer. I like to go about the speed of a snail and get everything just how I want it. But not this week—I’m writing this column as fast as possible.
(10/01/13 7:15am)
Check out The Daily Cardinal's Fall Arts Guide with events scheduled all throughout October, and remember to pick it up in print!
(09/26/13 4:36am)
Here are my descriptions of some really dumb things whose banality/stupidity you may have taken for granted:
(09/20/13 6:56pm)
If you’re skimming this (which, you undoubtedly are), it most likely means you’re familiar with my Page Two columns. When reading my work on the esteemed Cardinal humor page, some of you probably think, “Wow, I would never put my creative ideas out in a newspaper so anyone could laugh at and criticize them. That’s wicked courageous.” Or maybe your internal dialogue more-so goes something like, “I can’t believe this loser thinks he’s funny.”
(09/19/13 5:40am)
There are a lot of really good indie movies. From the bizarre early work of now blockbuster filmmaker Harmony Korine, including wandering flicks such as “Gummo” and “Trash Humpers,” to Miranda July’s uncomfortably moving “Me and You and Everyone We Know,” many have found ways to make incredible cinematic experiences sans a Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer budget or Academy actors.
(09/12/13 3:13am)
I’m becoming a Zen master.
(06/07/13 9:16pm)
It’s officially summertime because nights at the UW Memorial Union are once again filled with live music from both local and nationally touring acts.
(05/03/13 6:07am)
The Daily Cardinal recently participated in a conference call with Josh Tillman, who is currently playing under the name Father John Misty, and Cole Smith of the band DIIV, on their upcoming performances at Bonnaroo 2013.
(05/02/13 4:19am)
OK, this is going to be a fun one. Instead of doing something that required a grain of creativity, I decided this week just to go with the truth.
(04/29/13 6:09am)
The Daily Cardinal: Have you ever been to Madison before?
(04/25/13 2:00am)
I have this dream of writing something legitimately funny. Just about anyone can conjure up a cheap chuckle from a few people who are also desperate for acceptance, but it takes talent to make a bunch of people who would normally pass you on the street and instinctively think “I hate that person more than life itself,” laugh just because what you say has some kind of mystic connection to the elusive humor genome.
(04/23/13 5:13am)
The Daily Cardinal recently spoke with Nate Eiesland—lead singer of the band ON AN ON. Natives of the Midwest, ON AN ON will stop in Madison Thursday, April 25, at the Regent Street Retreat Stage.
(04/18/13 4:25am)
Is it possible to overdose on boredom? Would one even be aware of an event like this or would such a prophetic, insinuated self-fulfilling reality just quietly come to pass as that person faded into their next era of absolute pointlessness?