“These technological doodads are just too sophisticated for my itty bitty noggin.”
America’s youth are being indoctrinated, says Texas’ Governor Abbott.
“There is more to my personality than a functioning nose and the belief that the good smells are better than the bad ones.”
When asked to explain his vote, Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) said, it's "next to impossible to make a Middle Eastern child grow up to be an oil lobbyist for the United States."
The flaw can likely be at least partially attributed to being a Ye fan.
Some patrons are angered by the lack of Fox News and Morgan Wallen playing in the establishment.
The new lineup includes collaborations with Jack Daniels and Chips Ahoy.
The officer was intoxicated after accidentally drinking from puddles of poured out liquor.
The founders of The Onion, who are Cardinal alumni, are allowed to beat me up.
The soaring price of Milk Duds left Musk’s “boner killed” and his night ruined.
The Janesville mortician is motivated by how disgusting corpses are before being prepared.
State officials are ensuring that students are proud of Texas and the United States by giving them as little access to historical facts as possible.