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The Daily Cardinal Est. 1892
Saturday, June 22, 2024
Andy bluebook

A poem for midterm season

Ode to the students of no joy (or anything near happiness—a thing every human should value above prestige, which is a fleeting beacon of false security)

 
I don’t always write about

A legitimate concern.

The topic is often just funny

For me

(Aka: the most important thing).

But this week I’ve decided

To grow up

A bit

And riff on a subject

I’m less comfortable with.

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Me, well, I’m not the type

Who’s the first to brag

(Don’t worry this piece

Is not

An ego-fueled Magnum Rant.)

It’s more-so a visceral peek inside

The process

I have

Developed for keeping

A leg-up on college life.

See, each semester, this time,

Midterms roll around

And sharply remind me

That I

Don’t give a shit about them.

When engulfing these words

A first thought might be,

“This kid’s a student?

’Da hell

He get into university?”

Plz, plebes, calm down—

No need to be rash.

Our systemically learnt

Brains

Can’t handle a crash.

(That silly rhyme right above—

‘Sh’ with ‘sh’—

Is just

The sort of thing

OF WHICH WE NEED LESS!!!!)

Whenever I catch myself

Crossing my legs, worrying,

About something so banal

As a

Multiple-choice inquiry,

I step back, take a walk outside,

Because there

A test

Is lost in the ambience

Of starless, tan city nights.

There’s this appetite I have

To learn lots of things.

But, philosophical understanding

In school

Is simply getting good grades,

Which is a tragic idea, really,

At the end of the day.

Do you

Remember conversations with

Freshman-year TAs?

Not I—I can’t recall names

Of professors or classmates

From a semester ago,

Much less

The specifics of Henry Thoreau.

So this exam season, don’t

Pee yourself from fear

Dreaming

Of losing that precious 3.579.

You have time. You have time.

And if your parents call asking

About your current grades

Tell them, “It’s all good,

Ma, Pa.”

It’s still not too late.

Were you touched by Andy’s poetry about midterms? Share your feelings with him at andy@holsteens.com.

 
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