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COMPLETE UNIVERSITY OF WISCONSIN - MADISON COVERAGE SINCE 1892

Jordan Simon

Recent Articles

ALMANAC

In lieu of canceled presidential debate, Fox News to just air ninety minutes of Trump screaming at a Mr. Potato Head

Jordan Simon | 10/15/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

UWPD lashes out at ASM Chair with very high degree of confidence

Jordan Simon | 10/15/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

ASM to hold next ‘No Confidence’ vote in Ian’s Mac & Cheese Pizza

Jordan Simon | 10/08/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

Johnson aides unsure how to tell ‘anti-mask’ boss that a moon suit is just a stupid mask

Jordan Simon | 10/08/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

Lincoln: “Nobody asked me if I wanted to be removed – because I do”

Jordan Simon | 10/01/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

Man wants to jump off bridge after Presidential Debate but doesn’t trust structural integrity of America’s bridges

Jordan Simon | 10/01/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

UWPD arrests all members of ASM to show how well they can do job following 'No Confidence' vote

Jordan Simon | 10/01/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

ASM votes to open investigation into Becky Blank’s alleged collusion with the coronavirus

Jordan Simon | 09/24/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

Professor requires use of catheter during exams to ensure students not hiding notes in urethra

Jordan Simon | 09/17/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

Area robot faces backlash for ‘Starship Lives Matter’ tweet

Jordan Simon | 09/10/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

With decline in number of students lost in Humanities labyrinth, Minotaur from third floor using newfound free time to find love

Jordan Simon | 09/10/2020 9:00am

ALMANAC

In the era of coronavirus nothing matters anymore, so why is it still so hard to win a stuffed animal from a claw machine?

Jordan Simon | 04/27/2020 7:19pm

ALMANAC

Cardinalscopes: How you will contract coronavirus based on your sign

Jordan Simon and Bailey Hills | 04/24/2020 9:33pm

ALMANAC

Mifflin was ‘murican AF this year

Jordan Simon | 04/24/2020 5:52pm

ALMANAC

Opinion: I was filing for unemployment weeks before it was cool

Jordan Simon | 04/23/2020 11:09am

ALMANAC

Evers: Illinois residents to be placed on each street corner as encouragement for Wisconsinites to stay inside

Jordan Simon | 04/21/2020 10:27am

ALMANAC

Announcing an end to their use of superdelegates, the Democratic Party plans to interfere with democratic process using far subtler method: Rock ‘em Sock ‘em Robots

Jordan Simon | 03/30/2020 6:10pm

ALMANAC

Tom Brady social distances from New England Patriots, self isolates in Tampa Bay

Jordan Simon | 03/21/2020 4:05pm

ARTS

Railroad Earth brings folk rock energy and musical versatility to The Sylvee

Jordan Simon | 03/12/2020 8:00am

ALMANAC

STEM departments uncancel class: “Coronavirus panic creates exact type of stressful environment we want to train our students to thrive in”

Jordan Simon | 03/12/2020 12:00am

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