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Jess Gohlke, thermodynamics prodigy, revealed the findings of her anxiously awaited senior thesis early Monday morning, finally revealing her results regarding the hottest guy on campus.
A field of 7,500 knit-clad folks, a brisk autumn night and an absorbing Avett Brothers performance is an equation for an October utopia. The Avett Brothers, and their sea of fans, christened Breese Stevens Field on Friday night in the venue’s first-ever concert that sold out in 10 minutes.
Following weeks of conversation about women’s health issues, the Republican National Committee released an official statement Wednesday, solidifying their stance against family planning and highlighting the merits of “condom-free, willy-nilly baby-making.”
U.S. News & World Report has ranked the University of Wisconsin-Madison, often informally referred to as “Madison,” the top institution of higher learning in Madison, Wis.
In what is shaping up to be a controversial move, UW-Madison dining facility Gordon Commons announced Tuesday that they have decided to sell bottled human breast milk in the cafeteria.
Following an exciting cello concerto last Tuesday evening, Roger Duesburg of Verona, Wisconsin, began to forcefully and exuberantly beat his hands against one another in a perplexing display of appreciation for the performance. Duesburg, an avid classical music listener, was so overcome with joy and amazement that he lost all control of his uppermost appendages and their associated phalanges, and began using them to make a series of percussive sounds.
Markets continued to slide yesterday, this time following the results of a new study by the UW-Whitewater School of Business which claims that “the economy” has never existed. “Our data specifically indicates that the long-held economic notions of supply and demand, marginal utility and the natural rate of unemployment don't make any sense at all and can not possibly be real things," reads the study, which compared historical evidence with market data from over 25 countries.
Monday night, Democrats across Wisconsin cheered as Gov. Scott Walker officially announced he was ending his 2016 presidential campaign. The decision came after recent polls showed Walker with less than 1 percent of the vote. However, if you are a Democrat, now is not the time to be celebrating. In fact, you should be bracing yourself for the worst. It all comes down to one man: Marco Rubio.
By covering up his male genitalia, a 12-week-old unborn fetus successfully tricked his parents into believing he was a female during an ultrasonic examination Tuesday.
Late Friday night senior Brian Milton stumbled out of McKinley’s Irish Pub and let out a hoarse yell of “freshman!” at recent high school grad Liam Hamill with a look of deep satisfaction bordering on Zen-like peace.
Known for their quick starts, the Badgers impressed Saturday as they accelerated and never looked back right from the gate—the tailgate that is. The impressive debut to the 2015 season witnessed a flurry of early action in what amounted to a 22-0 halftime lead over opponent Miami (OH) in arrests.
Solutions by The State News
