U.S. News & World Report has ranked the University of Wisconsin-Madison, often informally referred to as “Madison,” the top institution of higher learning in Madison, Wis.
The rankings were painstakingly compiled using rigorous criteria, including number of students, number of NCAA championships, amount of research funding (in millions) and quality of campus food carts. Points were deducted in certain instances for things like unairconditioned lecture halls, bad Wi-Fi or for having Dick Cheney as a student at one point. “There’s a lot of lists like this out there,” explained U.S. News statistician Tony Burns. “That’s why we went the extra mile, isolating the most important metrics.”
In an era when student loan debt has surpassed credit card debt in the U.S., parents are looking for more detailed information on colleges than ever before.
“The Dick Cheney factor is huge for us,” clarified local mom Sandy Suzuki, “I’m really glad this information is getting out there.”
Most importantly, students and their parents are keeping future career prospects in mind in the face of rising levels of income inequality. “I didn’t know Dick Cheney went to Madison,” revealed area dad Sam Yutan. “That’s not cool.”
Overall, responses to the ranking were varied. “This is really useful information for me,” said Madison West High School senior Libby Swanson. “I was torn between all the great choices, but I’ve narrowed it down between UW-Madison and Regency Beauty Institute, since it came in second.”
Others were less enthusiastic. “I don’t really believe in rankings like this,” says former student and Wisconsin Halo 5 champion Paul Schmidt. “When I flunked out of UW, everyone acted like it was this big deal. But it was at the Gamers Club at MATC where I really found my calling.”
U.S. News & World Report is expected to release similar lists for the cities of Berkeley, Chapel Hill, Princeton and the Twin Cities in coming weeks.