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(12/02/21 1:00pm)
Santa Claus has never been known for his slim physique. While the health conscious often reach for green juice and protein bars, Santa opts for milk and cookies. Still, after nearly 2000 years, Kringle has managed not to veer out of the obese category. However, after rumblings of an elf-union potentially forming, Claus opted to replace his staff with the Keebler elves, resulting in a significant weight gain and the decision to have liposuction.
(12/02/21 12:00pm)
Welcome back to Soda Talk with Nick, Mackenzie and Gillian. They discuss Thanksgiving, the Omicron variant, the verb “transform,” South Park, the normalization of mass shootings, college basketball and whether the Beatles are overrated. To see more content from the Daily Cardinal's Almanac section, go here: www.dailycardinal.com/section/almanac. If you're interested in writing for the almanac or want to yell at us, DM us on Twitter @SodaTalkPod.
Almanac content is creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional. This content is fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.
(11/23/21 2:00pm)
University of Wisconsin-Madison students were able to take a breath last week as midterms officially came to a close. Evidently, roughly three tenths of a second into said breath, professors all around campus decided that it was time to work together to ensure that each student had at least three ten-page papers, two projects and other busy work due within the next week.
(11/11/21 1:00pm)
Since his election in 2010, Senator Ron Johnson has enjoyed his cushy career of being the lava-hot pizza cheese stuck to the roof of Wisconsin’s mouth.
(11/10/21 7:10pm)
Welcome back to Soda Talk with Nick and Mackenzie. They learn about temperature conversions, ruminate on the future, unpack the Aaron Rodgers saga, assess Sesame Street characters, discuss rushing the field and preview the Badger basketball season. To see more content from the Daily Cardinal's Almanac section, go here: www.dailycardinal.com/section/almanac. If you're interested in writing for the almanac or want to yell at us, DM us on Twitter @SodaTalkPod.
Almanac content is creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional. This content is fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.
(11/05/21 11:00am)
Nick and Mackenzie are back for another episode. They discuss Halloween movies, the Virginia election, Kohl’s Cash, the best sub sandwich shops, Mason Crosby, and dilf updates. Also, wtf even is a Hawkeye? To see more content from the Daily Cardinal's Almanac section, go here: www.dailycardinal.com/section/almanac. If you're interested in writing for the almanac or want to yell at us, DM us on Twitter @SodaTalkPod.
Almanac content is creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional. This content is fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.
(11/04/21 12:00pm)
Since the Pfizer vaccine was approved last winter, billions of people around the world have decided to get the jab. However, many Americans continue to refuse to be vaccinated against COVID-19 due to concerns that the research done by scientists just isn’t up to snuff in comparison to that done by random bloggers or podcast host and Ultimate Fighting Championship color commentator Joe Rogan.
(10/21/21 12:00pm)
The NBA’s two biggest trade targets are now off the market. After weeks to months of contention for the respective players, Kyrie Irving and Ben Simmons have been traded to the Flint Tropics.
(10/15/21 5:49pm)
Nick and Mackenzie are back with another episode of Soda Talk. We talk the curd burger, preview the Cardinal-H*rald flag football faceoff, discuss the Becky Blank news, propose some infrastructure solutions and play some hot dog trivia. Editing help from Michael Kuhn. To see more content from the Daily Cardinal's Almanac section, go here: www.dailycardinal.com/section/almanac. If you're interested in writing for the almanac or want to yell at us, DM us on Twitter @SodaTalkPod.
Almanac content is creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional. This content is fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.
(10/14/21 12:00pm)
This week, University of Wisconsin-Madison students were shocked to learn via Twitter that Chancellor Becky Blank has decided to leave the university at the end of the academic year to become the president of Northwestern University. While her tenure has seen an increase in graduation rates and a historic high of underrepresented students in this year’s freshman class, she is best known among students as the most prime meme material on campus.
(10/14/21 12:00pm)
Camp Randall has been the University of Wisconsin-Madison’s full-time football stadium since 1917. Considering its long and storied history, the Oct. 1 announcement that the stadium’s field would soon become known as Barry Alvarez Field was not received passively; the reaction was particularly strong among those with poor reading comprehension who believed that the stadium itself was being renamed.
(10/15/21 5:48pm)
Soda Talk is back with hosts Nick and Mackenzie. We talk Tina from Napoleon Dynamite, critical race theory, octopus hot dogs and anti-maskers on campus. Plus the return of Paytas updates. Editing help from Michael Kuhn. To see more content from the Daily Cardinal's Almanac section, go here: www.dailycardinal.com/section/almanac. If you're interested in writing for the almanac or want to yell at us, DM us on Twitter @SodaTalkPod.
Almanac content is creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional. This content is fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.
(10/07/21 1:00pm)
For years, Chancellor Rebecca Blank has been known for her love of milk, going so far as to appear in various pro-dairy videos and post a selfie of her drinking a glass to celebrate new graduates. Because of this, many have wondered what her go-to milk is; guesses range from calorie-conscious skim to indulgent whole milk. Unfortunately, there is now a new question in mind: Is Becky the milk connoisseur she is alleged to be, or is she about to break the hearts of thousands?
(09/30/21 1:00pm)
There was an uproar on Sept. 21 when the University of Wisconsin-Madison Police Department sent out a tweet stating that they would begin posting officers on University Ave. in an attempt to catch jaywalkers. If caught, students face a warning or, for multiple offenses, a fine of at least $150.
(09/30/21 1:00pm)
There have been questions about the long term efficacy of COVID-19 vaccines since immunizations began in December. In response, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has now recommended that certain groups receive a Pfizer booster shot. According to the statement released on Sept. 24, this includes those over the age of 65 and those with underlying medical conditions — though it is less necessary for those aged 18-49.
(09/23/21 1:00pm)
The Texas state legislature caused an uproar on Sept. 1 after passing a bill that bans abortions after about six weeks of pregnancy, often before pregnancy is noticed. This caused pushback from major companies such as GoDaddy, Lyft, Bumble, Match and Uber.
(09/23/21 1:00pm)
The comedy world was saddened on Sept. 14 to learn of the passing of stand-up and Saturday Night Live great Norm MacDonald following his battle with cancer. However, family, friends and fans can rest assured that MacDonald has already settled into the afterlife.
(09/16/21 7:00am)
College may feel more normal than usual, but not everything is quite the way it used to be, as students are still required to wear a mask while inside of campus buildings.
(09/16/21 7:00am)
There were very few benefits to online classes for students over the last year and a half. However, one such benefit was priceless — the ability to mute one’s self on Zoom in order to talk shit about classmates. Since in-person classes began at UW-Madison last Wednesday, the absence of this luxury has proved harmful for the friendships of students, as people forgot that those around them can now hear everything they say.
(09/15/21 3:00pm)
Dane County Executive Joe Parisi announced Tuesday in a press release that Dane County will be investing $570,000 toward the installation of ultraviolet air purification and air filtration units into the ventilation systems of several county-owned buildings to combat the spread of COVID-19.
