Madison police conduct over a dozen bar raids after lying to students
By Dominic Violante | Oct. 10“It was all too easy,” Chief John Patterson said.
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Madison police launch support group for former bar raid cops
By Dominic Violante | Oct. 6“They took my livelihood, my sense of purpose”
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Americans Against the Elderly endorses Cuomo for NYC mayor
By Dominic Violante | Oct. 2The anti-senior crusaders have thrown their full support behind the former governor for his “stellar record”
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Kash Patel wins staring contest
By Dominic Violante | Sep. 26Taking time out of his busy schedule, Kash Patel has become a champion at not blinking for long periods of time
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Who is Peter Pricket? Is this a farewell?
By Peter Pricket | Apr. 24Here are my final thoughts before I take a break.
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I live on an uninhabited island called PeterPricketistan that Trump put tariffs on. This is my story
By Peter Pricket | Apr. 24I was going to start a new religion.
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Congrats! You live in Eastern Europe now
By Ivan Stefanovich | Apr. 24The United States’ transformation into a model Eastern European state stands as a testament to the nation’s ability to evolve and embrace new paradigms.
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My great great Russian grandfather was an immigrant. Now I’m protecting the border
By Peter Pricket | Apr. 4No more American Dream.
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Polish conservative realizes he’s an immigrant in ethnic studies course
By Peter Pricket | Apr. 4I had my hands over my face. Next week’s lecture was on the Irish, wait until he finds out about them.
THE BEET
Elon Musk took a Gold Card out of his ass and gave it to me!
By Peter Pricket | Apr. 3I graduated from PETA University and then was given a Gold Card.
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Hawk Tuah girl and I are becoming pool reporters!
By Peter Pricket | Mar. 2HAWK TUAH ENTERS THE OVAL OFFICE WITH ME.
THE BEET
You aren’t going to start a revolution. You need to get a job
By Peter Pricket | Jan. 23Hot take: I have been realizing things and Peter Pricket is now coming forward with new ideas he has been hiding.
THE BEET
Peter’s haikus for you
By Peter Pricket | Jan. 23I’m feeling really poetic today, happy first day of classes!
THE BEET
Conservative student discovers pleasure for the first time through sex education module
By Peter Pricket | Dec. 5Today in my conservative WILL law course, I was told to do course evaluations. But, through a turn of bad clicks, my mouse landed on “SexWise Module.”
THE BEET
Undercover at Mnookin’s UWPD party: 90 Zyns, ketamine and a hummus platter
By Peter Pricket | Dec. 5I heard some murmurs of “free speech advocacy,” “marketplaces of ideas” and “DEI.”
THE BEET
Vote me for ASM. I will add a Department of Efficiency and cut UHS
By Peter Pricket | Dec. 5Fuck UHS, go raw milk, go Ozempic, vote me for ASM.
THE BEET
I graduated from PETA University. Now I electroejaculate monkeys
By Peter Pricket | Nov. 7Today I electroejaculated a monkey named Cornelly again. I am at odds with this work.
THE BEET
Catch me feds! I ballot stuffed 450 times in the 2024 election
By Peter Pricket | Nov. 7To feel the passion of Democracy I voted between three states for both Kamala and Donald.
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