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(03/17/10 6:00am)
There was a time in my life when I genuinely despised Apple.
Sure, my reasons weren't fantastic for hating them—almost every
person walks around with those idiotic earbuds, they have a smug
Justin Long in their annoying commercials and iTunes now makes me
feel guilty for downloading music illegally—but they were reasons
nonetheless. Now, however, I just think they are brilliant. Apple
has proven it can literally sell anything as long as they slap a
little apple on it. Their newest creation of either sheer genius or
dark humor, the iPad, is even greater proof. Apple has become so
cocky that they've chosen the worst name they could think of for
their latest monstrosity. Like most others, when I first heard the
name, I thought the iPad was something females stuck between their
legs, not a tablet computer. However, I've learned that the iPad is
only the beginning of Apple's campaign to see just how ridiculous
they can be and still sell products. Just get a load of some of
these new products Apple plans to release in 2010:
(03/15/10 6:00am)
I've lived in Wisconsin my entire life, save for the two
unfortunate months my family resided in the Cat-Skinning Region of
southern Illinois, and I am damn proud to be a Wisconsinite.
Recently, I have come to think that perhaps my undying love for my
state is a defense mechanism, as these past two years at UW-Madison
have been the first ones where I have had to fervently defend my
homeland's integrity, usefulness and attraction from the throes of
""Is it really a -40 degree windchill?"" and ""I am so fucking
bored, what am I supposed to do, bowl?"" and ""Why is everybody so
obese here?"" I, like many other natives to this state, have found
myself constantly making excuses for Wisconsin as if it were my
video game glazed-eyed, socially perverted and chunky tween
brother. Come on guys, he's not so bad! His acne'll clear up real
soon, and he's already got his third level 70 Orc in World of
Warcraft!
(03/04/10 6:00am)
Yeah, I'm an English major. Oh, good one. A book snob joke. Does
your deadbeat auto mechanic uncle write all your jokes for you?
Haha, a crack about my outfit. Yeah, so I'm wearing a turtleneck
sweater and drinking tea. LOTS OF PEOPLE WEAR THIS. IT'S CALLED
HAVING DIGNITY, ASS.
(02/22/10 6:00am)
The late Studs Terkel, an American author, had the amazing
ability to extract histories from people. He acted as a conduit for
rich history to flow through, unabated by conventional media
filters. Through Terkel we saw a different America, one overflowing
with humility, honesty, misery and unbridled joy. It was an America
that we all could identify with. The newest exhibit at the Madison
Museum of Contemporary Art, ""Apple Pie: Symbols of Americana,""
engages this same America largely via the Midwest.
(02/22/10 6:00am)
The pope has broken his silence over rock 'n' roll. Sure enough,
the Vatican's ""semi-official"" newspaper, L' Osservatore Romano,
has released its very own list of top ten rock 'n' roll albums of
all time, despite the immorality of the basic practice of ""rockin'
out"" due to its inherent blasphemy. However, it appears the
Vatican is branching out in ways never attempted and giving us a
rare sneak peek into the pope's potentially most-played albums on
his iPod.
(02/07/10 6:00am)
Through all the genre-saturation hullabaloo generated by the
Internet, there are two veins of sound most poised to identify
themselves as the namesake of the current decade-plus in music
history. Animal Collective's digitalized experimentation has the
most followers in both bands and fans, and its very literal
technology-bound soundscape makes it an easy candidate for the
title; but bands like TV on the Radio make a bold statement for a
different form of otherworldly inventiveness, one not tied to the
blips and bloops we associate with our own technological progress.
And it's in this second vein that Yeasayer find themselves on their
latest, Odd Blood.
(11/01/09 6:00am)
Of the 44,000 tickets sold for Freakfest, not all were bought to
parade around State Street dressed in disguise, but instead were
purchased to see the event's headlining band, Third Eye Blind.
(10/02/09 6:00am)
""Make sure that the beer—four pints a week—goes to the
troops under fire before any of the parties in the rear get a
drop."" —Winston Churchill to his Secretary of War, 1944.
(09/28/09 6:00am)
You come home from class and you're tired. Not just ""after
class"" tired, but tired like you just performed as Bucky at the
football game and then ran up and down Bascom 40 times. You have a
slight cough, chills and your only thought is hopping into
bed.
(09/15/09 6:00am)
A UW Hospital physician completed a nationwide study that will
help develop a treatment likely to change the way certain types of
vision loss are treated, UW Health officials announced Monday.
(09/08/09 6:00am)
In a season opener, history would suggest a traditional
Wisconsin game plan of heavy power running and controlling the game
on the ground.
(02/27/09 6:00am)
The Wisconsin softball team (5-8-0) will see some familiar faces
this weekend, playing in the Mayfair Tournament at Long Beach State
University in Long Beach, Calif.
(10/24/08 6:00am)
Madison Horror Film Festival, a daylong marathon of independent
horror films from around the country, will inspire nightmares this
Saturday at the Orpheum Theatre. The Daily Cardinal spoke to the
local filmmakers featured in the festival to get some insight into
what drives these Wisconsinites to horrify.
(10/20/08 6:00am)
The family curse has struck. I thought it had skipped my
generation; my brother and I seem relatively close to normal. But
as I lay in bed last night I knew I was to suffer the same fate as
my ancestors: I will never sleep again.
(04/29/08 6:00am)
Canadian quartet, Tokyo Police Club is back"" with their full
length debut, Elephant Shell, armed with an arsenal of new
songs and full of energy.
(04/22/08 6:00am)
At last, at long last, the icy clutches of winter are fading
away and the warm tendrils of spring are spreading over our campus
like just-thawing molasses. Spring brings many things with it:
warmer temperatures, inexpressible urges to throw around ovoid
leather objects and a variety of fantastic creatures that will
wreak havoc on my psyche. Creatures like mosquitoes (Culiseta
melanura), hornets (Vespa dentate) and centipedes (Keatonae
scareshitlessi).
(04/21/08 6:00am)
Three years ago, Elbow, a four-piece group from Manchester,
England, pulled out all the stops with Leaders of the Free
World - a dizzying array of hooks and clamors so filled with
symbolism and messages it felt like an M. Night Shyamalan film put
to music. Aside from the politically charged title track, Elbow
unleashed a cosine of emotion with each track, sending a shockwave
that resonated with fans until the group returned to the studio in
2008 for its latest album, The Seldom Seen Kid.
(03/06/08 6:00am)
The same technology used by EZ-Pass to tally miles traveled on
toll roads, monitor goods at Wal-Mart and track animal movement
through ear tags may lead scientists to improve the quality and
safety of the nation's blood supply, according to researchers at
UW-Madison.
(01/31/08 6:00am)
As incoming freshmen and their parents drive up Park Street on
the way to the dorms next fall in SUVs and station wagons brimming
with futon frames and shining appliances, they will pass something
unique to the UW.
(01/18/08 6:00am)
Since I've been cursed with a desire to be a writer, I always
tried not to care too much about material objects, knowing that one
day I'd probably have to give up most of them.
