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The Daily Cardinal Est. 1892
Monday, April 12, 2021

Badgers Don't Do Breaks: The Grind Really Never Stops

All articles featured in Almanac are creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional pieces. They are fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.

Spring break has sadly come to a close for students at UW-Madison and with it, every student is experiencing the satisfaction of finishing all of the extra homework that was assigned by professors over break. 

Yes, many students worked around the clock in the weeks leading up to the break so they could pass their midterms and turn in lengthy projects on time.

In an interview, Nic Turnal said that he “hadn’t slept for three weeks straight,” and that his current diet consisted of only “espresso shots, 5 Hour Energy, and straight-up cocoa beans.” 

But despite Bascom Hill being packed with students who appeared to be more zombie than human, students still found themselves packing their notes and books into their carry-on suitcases to bring with them on vacation, just so the learning wouldn’t stop! All across the country you could spot UW-Madison students hard at work on all of the fun and educational assignments they received right before the break. 

Every sandy beach in Florida housed a student sprawled out in the sun, sporting a new second-degree sunburn and a stealthy understanding of every organic-chemistry concept ever. 

A certain selfie taken at Cloud Gate in Chicago this past weekend even went viral because it pictured a college-aged man decked out in Badger gear as he measured the angles of reflection produced by the famous sculpture. 

And now, students are back in town, ready to face another wave of tests, projects, and papers knowing that all of those extra readings and homework problems they finished with joy and appreciation over break will guide them through the final six weeks of the semester until summer “break” begins.

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