Friday was a very special day for me. I don’t have classes on Fridays—I’m morally against them. However, this particular Friday my roommate, who has classes on Fridays, decided she didn’t this week. Why?
Well, friends, Friday was eight pairs of panties for $26 at PINK for exclusive members of PINK nation (aka us). While on our way, the social commentary, “PINK and Victoria’s Secret oppress women, empower men, blah blah blah” was playfully shoved aside to make room for “Pantiespantiespanties!”
My roomie and I spent blissful minutes picking out just the right panties, comparing color, style and fit. But why? They’re just underwear, I told myself. If nobody sees underwear, why do we care so much what they look like? For when people do see them, of course! People who care.
But who cares, really?
Gone are the gym-class locker room days of needing to impress our classmates with our boxer briefs or itty bitty thongs. Now, we get to wear whatever kind of undies we want, regardless of our peer’s input.
However, it seems the rat race to “most flattering undergarments” is never-ending. Hence Victoria’s Secret’s ever successful campaigns to make $39.99 bras completely necessary. The ladies everywhere seem obsessed with exciting their partners with matching bras and panties, corsets and negligées, but how important is this overpriced lingerie to making a sexy-times experience even sexier?
Each person I talk to has a different viewpoint—some think lingerie is simply another layer in the way of boobage. For others, it’s an integral part of the gettin’ down process. Let’s explore some of the processes behind our interpretations of “good coverage.”
In many ways, preference for panties (or boxers, tighty whities or the obvious favorite, boxer briefs) follows the often articulated “everyone’s different” spiel. It’s true—what I may like my best friend may hate, however we can still respect each other’s opinions and even discuss our opposite perspectives.
One piece of advice from a male-bodied friend reads, “If my partner thinks it’s pretty, I’ll think it’s pretty.” Of course, my friend wasn’t being noble and patiently agreeing with his significant other. He just knows things like lace, bows and rhinestones always look good when they are supporting some of our favorite body parts. Always.
Underwear can be super sexy if we choose not to remove them. For example, what if we don’t take our panties off? What if we leave our bras on? What if we do it with our pants around our ankles and our penis sticking out of our boxers?
So what! Those are all ways to experiment with new sensations and aesthetics the fabrics create. Some people find an erect penis proudly standing outside of jeans or briefs to be a huge turn-on.
What we’re allowing for here is a nice change of pace. Sometimes it’s really fun to just pull aside our undergarments instead of taking them off. Thongs that remain on create fun sensations for both insertive and receptive partners. Bras can make boobies look extra firm and round for on-top activity. Boxers and the like can rub against balls and sometimes clit if kept on.
Using lingerie as a way to role play can be fun, too! Incorporate it into power dynamics. Play boss and “sexretary,” Calvin Klein model and talent agent, even Heff and a Bunny!
While keeping lingerie on can be sexy spice, even hotter is finding creative ways to take it off. If by creative I mean oral.
Taking off panties or boxers with our mouths—or better, slipping either to the side—can be teasingly delicious, for everyone involved. For the undressee, having our partners’ mouth so close to our genitals can be tantalizing, especially if we feel their hot breath against our skin. For the undresser, getting to see—not to mention smell and taste—our partner’s goodie bits up close is a perfect warm-up for the oral or penetrative intercourse that may follow.
Let’s talk about my favorite type of support: SPORTZ BRAS. Although I done these babies daily to keep any semblance of boobage from occurring, they can be useful for more than just running and living in peace.
Flip up the underside of a sports bra so underboob becomes visable and stick a phallus up in there. Sports bras create the perfect tightness for intermammary intercourse, or as we like to call it, titty fucking.
That’s right! We can just lube those babies up, stick ‘em in a bra and slide a penis, cucumber or dildo all up in there to our heart’s desire. Friends, that’s taking advantage of a good product.
In the end, is lingerie probably a waste of money? Maybe, but people should be able to spend their cash as they’d like. If wearing lacey thong and bra sets or silk boxer briefs makes a person feel their best, they should splurge and watch their partners react to the new buys.
Leather or lace? Let Alex know whether you like or hate fancy boxers and lingerie by emailing sex@dailycardinal.com. Happy screwing!
