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The Daily Cardinal Est. 1892
Tuesday, May 21, 2024

Fake News Friday: “That kid” holds up Anthro lecture, infuriates peers

“That kid” everyone hates struck again during an introduction to cultural anthropology discussion Thursday afternoon.

“I asked the class a question, and there was this awkward, prolonged silence,” teaching assistant Emmanuel Kont said, “and then ‘that kid’ put his hand up.”

Anthropology 104 students recounted the skin-crawling discomfort of the classroom’s silence Thursday, as well as the disgusting predictability when “that kid” took it upon himself to answer the question.

“It was a stupid question,” junior Katie Stupere complained. “We all knew what the answer was, we just didn’t want to be the ones to say it. And then, of course, ‘that kid’ had to raise his hand.”

While everyone in Anthro 104 agreed they hated “that kid,” students struggled to pinpoint exactly why he infuriated them so much. After intense confusion and lengthy debate, most concluded, “he just blows.”

“Even I hate him and his smarmy, know-it-all, brown-nosing fuckery,” Kont admitted, adding: “Woo! It felt good to get that off my chest!”

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