This week MTV announced that its new show, ""Mendota Shore,"" would be returning for a second season. The show, which follows the lives of various UW-Madison 20-somethings in their daily misadventures, has captivated audiences who can't get enough of the group's wacky characters.
One of the most recognizable and well-known characters from the hit reality show is Mike ""The Complication"" Thompson. For an explanation of his nickname, it's probably best to let ""The Complication"" sort it out himself:
""They call me ‘The Complication' because I always seem to sleep with the ladies who already have boyfriends. After I friend a girl on Facebook, her relationship status always changes to ‘it's complicated.' I think it's because of my various infidelities, heh.""
In addition to ""The Complication,"" the new hit ""Mendota Shore"" also features Johnny ""DJ Magic Fingaz"" Jones. ""DJ Magic Fingaz,"" who is now one of the most famous DJs in all of Madison, hopes his newfound recognition on ""Mendota Shore"" will help him land his dream gig.
""My lifelong goal has always been to spin tables for the Mifflin Street Block Party,"" DJ Magic Fingaz explained. ""Well, my main lifelong dream has been sleeping with twins, but Mifflin Street Block Party is up there. I'd say it's 60-40 in favor of sleeping with twins.""
The show has recently come under fire for its portrayal of C.J. ""Heisman"" Swill, a partying football player who gels his hair twice a day and often finds himself in trouble with the law. Many find the show's depiction of Heisman a mockery of student-athletes.
Heisman, whose trademark phrase ""GTB"" (an abbreviation for his daily routine of the gym, Terrace and beer pong) has made him a cult hit, recently almost got kicked off the show for driving his Escalade through the Open Pantry's automatic doors at 3 a.m. on a Saturday night.
In addition to the males, the reality show also features Jessica ""J-Coww"" Schwartz, a plus-sized country girl from rural northern Wisconsin. When asked for an explanation of her nickname, Schwartz explained, ""Whenever I walk into a bar, the guys all say ‘J-Coww!' It just stuck with me.""
J-Coww, who admittedly reads at a third-grade level, made headlines early in the series when she inadvertently became lodged in the hot tub after a less-than-steamy make-out session with ""The Complication.""
In addition to J-Coww, the show also features Biddy ""Dookie"" Martin, the self-proclaimed ""Bitch Queen"" of ""Mendota Shore."" In the very first episode, Dookie tackled DJ Magic Fingaz into the Engineering Hall fountain, stole Heisman's moped and passed out on top of Bascom Hill's Lincoln statue in the fetal position—all within an hour's time. According to the show's producers, Dookie's longevity on the show may be in danger because the other cast members are ""just plain afraid of her.""
One of the more entertaining characters for the series has been Bucky, a mute, life-sized badger who communicates through hand motions and relies mostly on props and physical comedy. In general, almost every episode of ""Mendota Shore"" ends with Bucky in a hot tub surrounded by four naked females trying to simultaneously sleep with him. Bucky also doesn't wear pants. Ever.
Although the show has become a campus hit, some are worried about the lasting implications. UW-Madison neurology professor Sean Waits' new study shows serious lasting effects as a result of the show.
""According to my data, the collective IQ of the Madison campus drops almost 50 points on average when ""Mendota Shore"" is on,"" Waits explained. ""Students literally lose basic comprehension skills such as knowing not to gel your hair twice a day or believing that tanning is a serious health risk. ‘Mendota Shore' is literally killing off common sense.""
Despite the numerous complaints about stereotyping, lowbrow content and the rampant idiocy found in every episode, MTV producers stand by their product.
""At least it's better than ‘College Life,'"" said Greg Samuels, one of the embarrassed souls responsible for creating ""Mendota Shore.""
What's in store for the sexy, studious cast of ""Mendota Shore""? When asked to comment, Mike ""The Complication"" Thompson simply yelled ""Jäger bombs!"" into the microphone and jumped naked into Lake Mendota. Well said, Michael. Well said.
Think you've got what it takes to be on ""Mendota Shore""? Let Jon know at spike@wisc.edu.
