Yeah, I saw ""Spider-Man 3."" I also saw the reviews. Do I agree? Well, no. However, it's not my job to review this movie for the Daily Cardinal. That's been done. But for the last year, it has been my job to rant and rave and love and praise anything and everything about the land of movies. I've been all over the place: make-out movies, diatribes on the Academy, selling porn to strangers, a quiz, a fight club, film noir and more.
Once I wrote a column about superhero movies. I think I may have mentioned something about ""Spider-Man 2"" being my favorite movie of all time. This, weirdly enough, is the damn truth. So, in my mind, ""Spider-Man 3"" was never going to be the grandest spectacle the world had ever seen. It was always just going to be OK. Even if Sam Raimi had yanked the seat right out from under me, I don't think I would have been convinced. But this column isn't about my desire to analyze why. This is my last column ever. I've written about movies you should see before you die, movies of the decade and movies to rent when there is nothing to rent. In my last column, I want to write about my favorite movie of all time. I want to leave a big, spidey-shaped impression somewhere, and I'm leaving it on The Daily Cardinal.
Once I wrote a column about the romantic comedy, so it makes sense for me to call ""Spider-Man 2"" a love story. It mixes a mad scientist, a disgruntled best friend and the girl next door in creating an old-fashioned love story. Not only does Peter Parker (that's right, Peter Parker—he's not wearing the mask in the end) have to save Manhattan from near-certain destruction, but he also has to battle bitter inner-qualms and unemployment, all while proving himself to Mary Jane.
That said, my favorite parts of this movie are the various elements that send us straight back to the days of Cary Grant and Grace Kelly. I believe ""Spider-Man 2"" reflects quite a bit of black-and-white movie charm: soft lighting, a gold complexion and lines like this: ""After all these years, he's nothing to me but an empty seat."" Watch ""Spider-Man 2"" again, and you'll notice the dialogue is just idealized enough to make the movie sparkle in a way that is similar to ""The Philadelphia Story.""
Maybe I'm exaggerating. But I've thought about it a lot, and I think the old movie sheen on ""Spider-Man 2"" is what makes me love it so much—because you can search and search and watch every movie ever made under the sun, but the only conclusion you'll ever reach is that they just don't make them like they used to. It's a column I never got around to writing but something that I'll always believe. I love old movies. It's why I love new movies like ""Brick"" and ""Spider-Man 2."" They remind me of true love in black and white. The good old days, the ones before even our parents were born.
I'm such a geek, I know. And I missed ""Heroes"" on Monday so I'm a little unbalanced. Either way, I'm glad I got to write about movies every week for the whole school year. Thanks for reading my words, and if I could, I'd leave you now with that same look Mary Jane Watson has at the very end of ""Spider-Man 2."" Go get ‘em, tiger. And, from here on out, I hope every time you see Christian Bale's washboard abs, or notice that Captain Jack Sparrow might be a little too drunk to take on a ferocious lion, or kiss somebody while hanging upside-down, you'll think of me. Now, I'm out. Peace. And go, Spidey, go.
