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1. We’ve been here before, Frank Ocean and I. It wasn’t the top of this list—last year’s ranking placed his celebrated Nostalgia, Ultra tape at No. 7 —but the placement came with the qualification, more of a warning, that it was “just the introduction to music according to Frank Ocean.”
I am not a very sensitive person, nor do I ever plan to be. I’m not the kind of person that cries during emotional movies and some may say I have a black hole where my heart should be. I simply respond by quoting the great Ron Swanson, “Crying is only okay in two places: funerals and the Grand Canyon;” both of which I have never experienced.
I’m sure that many of us social media-savvy (read: “obsessed”) college students have shaken our heads in exasperation at the recent Facebook privacy statement hoopla. Or maybe you unwittingly participated in it. I won’t hold it against you, I guess, but I think that those in question on this particular subject are vastly overestimating—and at the same time underestimating—the power of mass social media.
I have been to hell. I have faced down the forces of evil. I have descended into the darkest reaches of existence and I have seen the blackness which resides in the hidden corners of men’s souls. What I mean to say is that I’ve gone to the comments section on an online article related to religion. I will never find a more wretched hive of belligerence and stupidity. Or at least I hope I won’t. Honestly, I don’t really want to talk about it, but I will. I set out on this Orphean journey in order to learn about the controversy surrounding the funding that Atheists, Humanists, and Agnostics received from the Associated Students of Madison for next year. According to their website, AHA is a student organization dedicated to “promot[ing] the discussion of faith and religion on the UW-Madison campus” and “educat[ing] students on issues important to the secular community, and encourag[ing] the personal development of one’s religious identity.” Basically, it’s a student organization for, well, atheists, humanists and agnostics. The group has gotten a lot of publicity lately following ASM’s provision of almost $70,000 for their budget next year.
Samy from five weeks ago would not recognize Samy today. My life has been forever changed, quite suddenly, by Michael Jackson.
STATE COLLEGE, Pa.—For the third time in just four games, the Wisconsin Badgers (4-4 Big Ten, 7-5 overall) suffered a heartbreaker in overtime, this time at the hands of the Penn State Nittany Lions on senior day (6-2, 8-4) by a score of 24-21.
In the 21st century, most artists already have a perfectly designed genre to describe their band’s music. Adding the suffix “core” and the prefix “post” can instantly place any obscure or underground act into a pre-determined niche. Post-hardcore, grindcore, post-punk, post-punk revival and even the hilariously named post-blues (this is a real thing, I am not making this up) are among the myriad of ridiculous examples of sound identification today. This brings the discussion to another baffling style: slowcore.
Cards on the table, I might be the most awkward person in the world. My awkwardness isn’t even Michael Cera in “Arrested Development” funny, it’s more Michael Cera in real life sad. What I’m offering to you all today is the excruciatingly embarrassing vignettes that make up my life; enjoy my pain.
We are born into a frightening and unfamiliar existence. We emerge into a world full of things we do not understand, and we are scared. As infants, we cling to our mothers for comfort and we cry when left alone. As young children, we fear the shadowy unknown of a closet or the underside of our beds, and we run back to our mothers at the striking and powerful sound of thunder or the eerie whistling of the wind. As we grow older, we learn about the world and its mysteries. We learn that we have nothing to fear from the dark blanket of night or the terrible crack of thunder. Our fear is driven away by our knowledge and growth.
While it seems like a lot of people in my grade (15th, technically) are sailing across the seas to foreign lands to delve into academic rigor and life-changing adventures through a study abroad experience, there are actually a lot of us who, apparently, are too attached to Wisconsin winters and the beautiful bruises you get from slipping on black ice to pack up and head out. It’s a lot easier to meet new friends wearing a facemask with your head down swearing profusely during blizzards than it is in a new, exciting environment.
Nick Cosgrove knew the very first time he saw “Jersey Boys” that Frankie Valli was the role for him.
Donald Trump’s hair and the big orange person it sits on top of were on television again. As many of us know, Trump’s hair has been conducting investigations on President Barack Obama’s past in an effort to prove he was not born in America. The wispy blond strands made news two weeks ago when the person underneath them announced he would write a check for $5 million to a charity of Obama’s choice if the president released his college records and passport paperwork. I imagine the president will choose not to dignify this message with a response. Sometimes the best way to get a child to stop crying is to ignore him.
Few entertainment franchises enjoy the widespread recognition that “Halo” has achieved. The latest installment, “Halo 4,” marks a new era for the series as the first release from 343 Studios, the company charged with taking over for the legendary development studio Bungie. With this impending transition, it seemed like the perfect time to reflect on the history of this incredibly influential video game series.
In some ways, Bruce Springsteen’s presidential stump in downtown Madison Monday resembled his 2004 visit with Massachusetts Sen. John Kerry.
When I heard thousands of runners turned out Sunday morning in Central Park despite the cancellation of the New York City Marathon, I could not have been more proud of the sporting community.
Everybody has that one type of friend—the one who’s a little self-serving, a little cruel, a little too smart for his own good. In the case of Dorian Gray in Oscar Wilde’s classic, “The Picture of Dorian Gray,” this friend happens to be Lord Henry Wotton, a smooth-talking and devilishly intelligent member of London high society.
Americans are confused. No, I am not a communist or a self-loathing civilian, but it is the truth, and Americans are confused on an issue that cannot be ignored: The First Amendment. The First Amendment protects free speech from government action, not privatized company action. About two weeks ago, Reddit, the self-proclaimed “front page of the Internet,” an online forum driven by user participation, edited their site following a report from the news blog Gawker. Gawker outed an infamous Redditor (online lingo for Reddit users), posting under the handle Violentacrez, who gained his notoriety from his tendencies to start forums based around the uploading of child pornography, misogyny and violence. Instantly, Internet users demanded an explanation regarding Reddit’s violation of the First Amendment. The only problem is that Reddit is privately owned and capable of silencing whomever it pleases.
Just days ago, controversy ensued after Angela McCaskill, diversity officer at Gallaudet University in Washington, D.C., signed a petition that would put a Maryland same-sex marriage law that allows gay marriage to popular vote.
In the Vice Presidential debate last Thursday, Congressman Paul Ryan discussed the role of Catholicism in his life, saying, “My faith informs me about how to take care of the vulnerable, of how to make sure that people have a chance in life.” Indeed, many Republicans attribute Christianity as a defining part of their political beliefs and policies as evidenced by their party platform which referenced God more than 10 times.
Oh leap year, I remember when you were so cool. We got that extra day, I celebrated my friend Bryce’s rare birthday (he’s 5 now) and we spent a whole year making frog jokes (well we did when I was in the third grade). But now that I’ve turned 20 years, Leap Years are only synonymous with one thing: the presidential election. And oh my God I am tired of it.
Solutions by The State News
