1. Coal: That ancient ancestor who always farts and refuses to die.
2. Nuclear: Super hip and cool, everyone wants to be him. That temper though... One time he burned a house down then blew up the responding fire trucks because someone spilled his beer.
3. Wind: He’s here I promise, I just saw him five minutes ago. Maybe by the vending machine? Whatever, he’ll turn up eventually to remind you he never left.
4. Solar: Holy shit she’s hot, like honestly a 10. As long as you are able to give her some expensive jewelry or cut off your hand for her she’ll love you forever.
5. Hydropower: Dam I can’t think of anything. Sea the amount of pier-pressure I get writing for the Cardinal?
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