1. How many teeth do you have?
A. 0-5
B. 6-15
C. 16-40
D. You lost your mouth to infection after biting into defective hardtack.
2. When you’re not being a general you’re…
A. Just Chilling
B. Keeping up with the Kardashians
C. Eating your steak rare
D. Drinking home brew
3. What’s the name of your prized stallion?
A. Meshuggah
B. Mother’s Silver
C. Michael Mouse
D. Good Horsey
4. Every little thing you do is…
A. Mortifying
B. Magic
C. Unbecoming
D. Just wrong
5. Your guilt food is…
A. Nails
B. Flamin’ Hot Cheetos
C. Ben and Jerry’s Siracha-flavored ice cream
D. Peanut Butter and Jelly Beans
6. If you were a civil war general, what would your name be?
A. Heath “Bloodsucker” Jones
B. Ulysses S. Grant
C. Braxton Bragg
D. Stonewall Jackson
7. What is your sleeping position preference?
A. Side
B. Back
C. Upside-down
D. On the wrong side of the bed
8. Which political faction do you stand with?
A. Bull Goose party
B. Wigs
C. Cheddaralists
D. Republicrats
Solutions: A. Heath “Bloodsucker” Jones B.Heath “Bloodsucker” Jones
C. Heath “Bloodsucker” Jones D. Heath “Bloodsucker” Jones
