Oh, Halloween. More than any other holiday, Halloween haunts you, in all stages of life. Whether you’re a kid trick-or-treating or a college person trying to be creative in their costume choice, whether you’re a parent sending your children into the night or that elderly person on the corner of Elm who thinks that Werther’s Original is exactly what the children want these days, Halloween haunts you.
But back to that college person. Picking costumes is hard. I know this as well as you. Which is why (for your benefit) I’ve compiled a few choice/off the beaten track costume ideas sure to impress all those other persons you seem so hell-bent on impressing.
Friedrich Nietzsche
Slap on a big ‘ol bristly mustache, put some forming cream in your hair and let yourself be eternally justified as an aesthetic phenomenon! Or let yourself be misinterpreted by German nationalists! The choice is yours—though not actually!
The Banach-Tarski Paradox
A real humdinger in the field of set-theoretic geometry, this also makes for a great Halloween costume. The principle is thus: given an object (the theorem uses a ball), it’s possible (possibly) to carve the object into disjoint subsets and then (using the axiom of choice) put the pieces back together to yield two copies of said object. Great couple/identical twin costume idea, though you’re more than free to try applying the principle to yourself if you’ve got a free weekend and understanding friends.
An Axolotl
A critically endangered species of salamander, the axolotl (whose etymologic forbearance is “water monster”) is a fascinating creature that originally dwelled in two Mexican lakes. Great care should be taken in the creation of this costume. Bonus points to anyone who can replicate the texture of its skin and gill-lung apparatus!
Berlin
Dating back to roughly the end of the 12th century, Berlin has a storied legacy within European history and is today a wonderland of architecture, culture and urban life. And now you (yes, you!) can be Berlin too. The key isn’t so much dressing up like a Berlin as it is thinking like a Berlin. People should be able to experience you, Berlin, and be able to enjoy your splendorous Alte Nationalgalerie and carouse through your busy avenues. And if you like them well enough, Berlin, you can let them through your Brandenburg Gate.
J.F. Powers
An esteemed American writer, whose principal subject was the lives of Midwestern Catholic priests, you can take this costume in a few different directions: Maybe go as young Powers, dressed in coat, pipe in mouth, shoveling snow at his St. Paul home. Or maybe the Powers of 1963, when he won the National Book Award for “Morte D’Urban.”
Stephen A. Douglas Dressed As A Deep Sea Diver
A riff on the classic matryoshka doll (Russian nesting doll, babushka doll), you’ll be the envy of your friends and enemies alike, as you portray the 19th century Illinois senator in full diving garb… searching for cowries? You decide! You can also use this costume as a base for further permutations, such as: Stephen A. Douglas Dressed As A Deep Sea Diver Dressed As A Judge Dressed As Robocop Dressed As Marilyn Monroe Dressed As Bucky Badger (my personal favorite).
Eugene Delacroix’s “La Liberté Guidant Le Peuple”
This costume is a feat for a single person to pull off, given that the painting comprises thirty plus distinct figures. But it also makes for a great crowd/collective costume. Bonus points to anyone who carries this costume out in a fashion similar to the Jorge Luis Borges story, “The Theme of the Traitor and The Hero.”
A Pervading Sense of Dread
This is a very creative costume, since (as we all know) dread takes many guises. Want to express your particular dread? Don’t limit yourself to wearing all black! Go for some navy blue or a dark forest green. Or maybe some hot pink and hunting orange. Remember: dread is universal!
The Patriarchy
This is a great costume for guys, since they don’t have to do anything differently. This principle also applies if you want to go as White Privilege, Heteronormativity, The Wage Gap and/or Superman.
Want some advice on how to pull off the Nietzsche come Oct. 31? Email Sean at sreichard@wisc.edu
