Unsatisfied with her mid-level position on an ottoman, dancing party-goer Stephanie Lake sought out higher ground at 222 N. Carter Saturday night.
Lake tenaciously scanned the living room for taller furniture after she realized at least three other party girls were dancing above her current elevation. Determined to be the center of attention, Lake began a methodical ascension that lasted about 20 minutes, party sources confirmed.
“It was like an imaginary liquid was slowly flooding the room,” 222 N. Carter resident Matthew Schmidt said. “She just kept going up higher, like she was trying to keep her head above the rising waterline.”
From the ottoman, Lake clambered onto the coffee table. And, from there, she made her way onto an arm of the sofa. Finally, Lake tip-toed across the sofa and on top of a high-backed La-Z-Boy chair.
Lake had reached the party’s summit. She was higher up than anyone else, and, according to Cardinal reporters that snuck into the party, took great delight in touching her fingers to the ceiling while gyrating to the music.
If attention was her goal, she achieved it, 222 N. Carter residents said.
“I don’t think I ever would have noticed her at ground level,” said resident Jared Lang . “She really got up there!”
Lake was riding high, but she had overestimated the stability of the La-Z-Boy.
At press time, Lake, a sobbing mess, was being helped off the unforgiving hardwood floor by snickering party-goers.
