Dear Alex,
My boyfriend and I just got back to campus and are already back to our old routine in the bedroom. I love to have sex with him, but we’re looking for ways to diversify our sex life without going overboard. Please help!
—Routine Ultimately Tedious
Dear RUT,
One of the best ways to get out of our old rut is to veer away from our go-to locations and positions. There is a really easy way to do this, and for most people, it begins with getting out of the bedroom.
Many people have sex in beds for good reasons: Beds are comfortable, allow one to be flexible and hold people in place without being too firm. Additionally, most people who live in apartments or houses have a little privacy in their rooms. Shut the door and anything goes (as long as we’re not too loud… and our roomies don’t mind).
My advice to anyone in this pickle is start out by having everyone in our residence print out weekly schedules and post them somewhere easily found by all, like the refrigerator or the door. Make sure the outlines are as comprehensive as possible—include classes, work, exercise, play.
I know y’all can see where I’m going with this one—all we need to do is find a time when all of our roommates will be gone for a while and find out if our partner or partners have that time open.
Unfortunately, the more roommates we have, the more difficult this whole process becomes. A good way around that problem is to find a time our roomies are all leaving the house together—whether for a party or just to grab some food—and quickly shuffle our partners over. Piece of cake.
So, we finally have the whole house to ourselves! What do we do next? Assuming we’ve discussed the recreational limits of household furniture with our roommates (e.g. can I screw on the sofa, counter, etc.), we can go to town.
One of the best places to get it in is the kitchen. The possibilities are endless. Let’s start with the table or countertop. If positioned at the right height for our partners and ourselves, the flat surface can provide a perfect platform for either a doggie-style position or a missionary-style position, with a twist.
The receptive partner can either stand on the floor and bend their torso onto the counter (for doggie-style) or lay face-up on the counter (for missionary) while the insertive partner in both cases stands on the floor between the former partner’s legs.
From there, have at it! The slightly different angle, lack of “give” and the standing partner’s ability to have a more grounded platform to thrust from can create for a powerful sensation for all involved.
But don’t stop there. The kitchen is full of good options. On hot days when we’re without air conditioning, try a standing-rear-entry (aka upright doggie) position and stick those heads in the fridge or freezer. I know it sounds funky, but it can really relieve the heat often brought on by sex and can create a shocking sensation that may heighten your senses elsewhere.
Another great “home-alone” option is the shower. Everybody and their sister loves doin’ it in the shower, but there are positions better suited for wetter situations. Again, standing-rear-entry is a great one because all partners can spread their legs apart enough to give themselves a wide base and lessen the chance of slipping.
Once we’re comfortable, we can begin to vary the angle—the receptive partner may want to lean forward and lean against a lower part of the shower wall. We can even place a bottle of shampoo in front of ourselves and bend forward, holding onto the bottle as support. If we’re flexible enough, we can even fold in half and place our hands on the floor in front of us. The water will drip down to our face and make us tingle all over.
A challenging way to use the shower to its full potential is to go down on our partners while we’re in there. Once again, the drip drops of water against our partner’s torso and head will make the sensations our mouth creates even steamier (as will the, you know, steam). It’s important to only give head in the shower when we are facing away from the stream because we should always be able to breathe.
Finally, we should consider the couch. Equipped with fun angles to play with and soft cushions, we may even have the option of watching some porn on the TV while we’re going at it! Spooning our partners on the couch (whether or not we’re engaged in intercourse) can make us feel close to each other.
We can also try receptive partner on top (cowgirl or cowboy) on the couch. The insertive partner will have a firm back to lean on and good leverage from the floor if they want to thrust upward. If the receptive partner will be doing the work, the back of the couch will be a great place to grab ahold of to help move their body back and forth or up and down.
As always, we should remember to respect the limits agreed upon by our roommates and make sure to clean up when we’re finished.
Got questions for the Dirty Bird? Send questions to Alex at sex@dailycardinal.com.
