After police arrested UW-Madison researcher Christopher Schwartz for growing between 200 and 1000 grams of marijuana in the Biochemistry Building, two students and a botany professor came to the conclusion that growing the ganj “wasn’t dope” or in other words, not as big a deal as heroin to get angry about.
Super senior Chip Biggins said he thought Schwartz could have had a more lucrative business harvesting something more illegal.
“I can appreciate the whole ‘Breaking Bad’ thing the guy was going for, but I mean, come on. Might as well’ve been growing coke or ecstasy.” Biggins said.
Mary Joan Malloy, a junior, was completely unaware of the entire incident.
“Damn, Chris got locked up? That’s rough. He was a generous guy, never asked questions either,” Malloy said, between bites of a chalupa. “Why all the attacks on small-business owners?”
While the UW administration said in a press release that they were “uneasy” about possible copycatters starting their own cannabis gardens, botany professor Guy Mitchell said, “Ehhhhhh,” shrugging.
“I don’t think we have to worry about someone doing what Schwartz did,” Mitchell said. “His stuff was too good to be replicated.”
