The sad reality of entertainment is whenever something good and even slightly original comes along, it inevitably paves the way for knockoffs. Nirvana had its copy in the band Candlebox. \Saturday Night Live"" had its ""Laugh-In."" Now, after having already produced a mediocre sequel, ""Blade"" has a very flimsy knockoff in ""Underworld.""
""Underworld"" follows Selene (Kate Beckinsale), a vampire whose order has spent centuries hunting down Lycans, a savage race of werewolves. When Selene is saved by a human, Michael (Scott Speedman), she cares for him in her lair, drawing the ire of her superior, Kraven. Selene discovers that Michael was targeted by evil Lycans looking for the right human for a Lycan-vampire hybrid. As her feelings for Michael blossom, Selene must fight the Lycans and uncover the corruption around her in the process.
The immediate calling card of ""Underworld"" is its visual style. The dark lighting, blue tinting and constantly moving camera all combine with tight leather and black-haired baddies to quickly evoke the memory of ""Blade."" This is a visual style that worked very well for ""Blade"" and works pretty well for ""Underworld,"" too. But the general look and tone of the movie grows terribly monotonous. This leaves the movie prey to a few bigger problems.
The biggest problem is the lack of plot. The audience is given the background story of the Lycans and the vampires, but that is not the same as having a story to propel the movie through its 121 minutes. The love story between Michael and Selene is supposed to be central, but the two rarely say anything to each other. Saving each other's lives while looking great is not the same as love.
It further hurts that the cast is so underwhelming. Beckinsale is a decent actress, but she just is not a leading lady. ""Serendipity"" exposed her mediocrity as a romantic lead, and now ""Underworld"" shows that she is not cut out for an Angelina Jolie-type action part either. Speedman, meanwhile, seems to fit the mold of Luke Wilson's recent work. He is a harmless pretty boy with nothing much to say, who can look good but still be non-threatening. The only difference is that Wilson is capable of better. The fact that Speedman is a good fit for a prominent role here is merely indicative of the mediocre writing.
Sadly, even the movie's basic popcorn appeal fades as it goes along. Eventually the Lycans and vampires all look alike. The fight scenes that are exciting at first become monotonous and boring. But it gets worse. The sound effects are so bad that at one point, Beckinsale bites into her own wrist and it sounds like a rotten tomato being thrown at a barn. Worst of all is when a climactic special effect is hysterically funny, completely unintentionally. Perhaps first-time director Len Wiseman should stick to music videos. There, he only has to assemble three-minute segments of cool visuals and there is no need for storytelling ability.
While ""Blade"" proved it is possible to make a dark, profitable and compelling action movie about vampires, ""Underworld"" mostly makes us realize how underrated Wesley Snipes and Stephen Dorff are. In the meantime, what we have is a derivative, humorless and startlingly underwhelming movie. Do not encourage further knockoffs by supporting ""Underworld.\
