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The Daily Cardinal Est. 1892
Saturday, May 04, 2024

Alka-Seltzer for the soul: Eating out, sobering up

Some say the most important lessons at a university are learned outside of the classroom. I happen to agree.  

 

 

 

My Econ 101 professor taught me the merits of supply and demand. A former roommate showed me how to dance like a crazy fool.  

 

 

 

While I seem to have forgotten the finer points of economics, I can still shuck and jive with the best of them.  

 

 

 

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Just as music appreciation is essential to a quality education, so it is with \practical nutrition."" This is not memorizing the food pyramid or figuring out how many hours to spend on the treadmill to burn off a Snackwell's brownie.  

 

 

 

Nope, the most useful knowledge to be gained on a university campus (especially UW-Madison), when it comes to metabolism, digestion and the like, is how exactly to handle liquor. 

 

 

 

Who can deny the value of discovering the surprising potency of Pabst or the awfulness of anything associated with Fleischmann's? We can enjoy ourselves without scaring off a potential mate or ruining a best friend's carpeting.  

 

 

 

Some spend years honing the craft of alcohol consumption; sadly, others fritter away their college years with less important matters like ""studying"" and ""career planning."" 

 

 

 

OK, I kid, but to a point. As Harvard studies and ALRC fines show us, college kids like to drink. It's important that they learn to do so responsibly. Even my Grandma June can agree with me on that one. 

 

 

 

Holding your liquor is one thing; learning to live with yourself the morning after is another matter entirely. 

 

 

 

Some people cope with booze-fueled nausea by drinking water. Others have the notion that continuing to drink will solve the problem and don't bat an eyelash while sucking down a double Bloody Mary.  

 

 

 

Speaking of Mary, I wouldn't be surprised if a few crazies out there take care of a hangover by going through a rosary and begging for forgiveness.  

 

 

 

I prefer to pass on the prayer and alcohol and go straight for food. Still, I'm not quite sure I've found the perfect dining establishment to nurse a hangover. However, I do have a short list of criteria that every good hangover restaurant must have.  

 

 

 

An all-day breakfast menu is essential. Nothing says ""We all have our rough nights now and then"" like a restaurant that lets you order pancakes at 5 p.m. 

 

 

 

Comfy booths are nice too. A little vinyl-and-velour induced relaxation does a jumpy stomach well.  

 

 

 

A final essential item for a good hangover joint is a diverse clientele. It's nice to get lost in the anonymity of townies and tourists and forget about school for a while.  

 

 

 

So, those are the qualities that make for a good place on the morning after. I'll keep you posted on my quest to find the best such restaurant.

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