Franklin, Wis -- Attendees of the Weber family Thanksgiving expressed general confusion with regards to what Uncle Russ was doing in the other room with the turkey leftovers after dinner.
Between the conclusion of the main course and the desert period of the evening program, Russell, 47, took the remains of the five pound turkey into the room adjacent to the dining area and has not emerged since, according to sources.
“I was pretty surprised when he offered to help clean up the turkey, since he never really helps out at Thanksgiving,” host Laura Weber, 42, told Daily Cardinal reporters. “And then, instead of taking it into the kitchen he brought it to the den and shut the door.”
Russ Weber has been a consistent guest and leading eater at his sister-in-law’s Thanksgiving gatherings throughout the years. Family sources reported that his presence is rarely felt, other than the years when the Packers lost.
“I can only imagine what’s going on between Russ and that turkey in my study,” Jeff Weber said. “Russ has been single for quite a few years now, so I’m just gonna leave him be.”
Some guests were more concerned than others.
“I don’t care what he’s doing, I just want him to finish quickly so I can play Minecraft on my dad’s computer,” Jackson Weber, nine, told the Cardinal when questioned.
“Usually the kids get leftover turkey sandwiches in their lunches the week following Thanksgiving,” Laura explained. “I’ll have to find something else for them to eat this year.”
At press time, Russ’s father Henry hurriedly suggested that the family should attempt to finish all of the warm apple pie while Uncle Russ was still in the other room.
