Valentine’s Day often fills many with anticipation, but it also has the potential to bring feelings of dread. In the case of most people who aren’t drowning in cuddles, cute dates, good morning texts and nauseating hand holding, this day isn't the best. This is the one day of the year where the pressure is on to be in love and show it through chocolates from CVS or an overpriced dinner you definitely can't afford.
But what about us singles? Do you think we are just going to sit here, endlessly scrolling through social media seeing everyone else enjoy their day? Yes, we are — but we’re not going to have a care in the world. I am here to give you the ultimate guide on achieving that “IDGAF” energy this Valentine’s Day season.
First things first, understand that we have the upper hand here. Don’t be fooled by society's expectations of having to be with someone or holding that “someone’s significant other” label. Everywhere you turn, you will likely see some sort of advertisement or Valentine’s Day sale. Ignore them, and realize your bank account isn’t being depleted because of a national holiday that isn't very inclusive. Laugh it off — it isn’t that deep.
Similarly, Valentine’s Day can be stressful for everyone involved. Whether you are in a situationship, a relationship or nothing at all, you are always looking at Valentine’s Day for an answer. People experiencing a “fling” use it for a “Hey, so what are we?” checkpoint, and if it ends up being nothing, it can be disappointing. This also puts pressure on people in relationships to go above and beyond to show their love for their person when really, there is so much more to a relationship than just what partners do for each other on Valentine’s Day.
You shouldn’t stress over what your significant other will do for you on this superficial holiday. If they are really the person for you, they will do whatever is tailored to your desires without you having to ask or wonder. However, you should avoid setting expectations for whichever situation you’re in. Just try to enjoy the day regardless of what your circumstance is.
And don’t forget about the permanent people in your life: your friends. Now is the time to plan a “Galentine’s Day” for your friends to enjoy. It doesn’t even have to be on the exact day. Just make sure you surround yourself with people you love and don't forget to tell them that. Significant others may come and go for a while until you find your person, but friends are forever.
Sometimes, people who don’t meet the romantic qualifications for Valentine’s come off as the “Scrooges” of the holiday. Negativity towards the holiday is common for people not involved in the day. However, we singles like to claim we are independent, free-spirited and doing so much better than everyone else overall. Surprise — we aren’t. No one is perfect. We all need to take our own advice, myself included. Valentine’s Day is never the only time to “claim your independence.”
Something we all have in common is the need to prioritize self-love. Use Valentine’s Day — and everyday, for that matter — to focus on yourself. After all, you can’t fully love someone else if you don't love yourself first. Remember that if someone comes into your life, they are an addition because you are already whole.
Again, don't be fooled by false expectations and stereotypes surrounding this holiday. If anything, get excited because spring is right around the corner. Remember to embrace self-love. Channel that “out of sight, out of mind” mentality, and remember to care for yourself while also caring for those you love.