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The Daily Cardinal Est. 1892
Monday, June 14, 2021

Swipe^2

All articles featured in Almanac are creative, satirical and/or entirely fictional pieces. They are fully intended as such and should not be taken seriously as news.

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

Who will I swipe tonight,

Am I looking for some fun?

Or am I looking for the one?

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

I got a new match,

DM,

Alright, 

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

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“I’ve never dated a black

 women before…”

Unmatched,

God, not another one!

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

How did my friend meet

 the one?

Did she swipe 24 hours a

 day,

Was she even having fun?

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

DM,

“Dinner and a movie tonight?”

I guess that sounds like fun

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

One date, two dates, 

I think it’s going well

Ghosted.

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

Is this millennial love?

Boiled down to a few math   

algorithms 

And superficial profiles

Swipe Left, Swipe Right

I could swipe all night

Will I ever be happy?

Delete. 

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