Sex. Now that I have your attention, what do you think is better than X-rated adult movies? If after five minutes of racking your brain and scratching at inappropriate places you could not come up with an answer, shame on you. But I can tell you that five-minute long sexually explicit films made by ordinary people like us—next time you’re on the bus, it’s a good bet that the people next to you are among them—definitely is a winner.
Madison very proudly welcomed Dan Savage’s HUMP! Tour for the first time ever this past weekend. Showing at The Majestic, it featured the best of the Pacific Northwest’s sexiest film festival. Since its conception in 2005, it has become a platform for ordinary people to become porn stars by starring in and making their very own five-minute dirty movie, all for a bid of winning big cash prizes and doing something crazy.
Some of you might know Savage for his internationally renowned relationship and sex advice column. According to Mr. Savage in a press release for the HUMP! Tour, “People laugh, they gasp, sometimes they cover their eyes. But at the end of every film people clap and cheer. It’s moving and wonderful and newcomers don’t expect it. The whole festival is a celebration of sexual diversity.”
There’s something to float everyone’s boat. You have your vanilla stuff, as well as sexy and artsy, artsy and weird, disturbing and weird, laugh-your-pants-off weird. In short, just “every color in the sexual rainbow,” in the festival’s own words.
So “Why do this?” was my first thought, something one of the participating filmmakers (who wished to remain anonymous) answered in an email to The Daily Cardinal. “We’d been fans of HUMP! for years, and it was a combination of pride in our local Northwest sex-positive film festival, a story we wanted to tell and a group of talented friends who all shared the feeling, ‘Hey, we could do that!’”
There! That sounds pretty normal, right? Upon viewing, these people would remind you more of you and your friends getting all freaky with each other and having a big ol’ laugh about it, rather than the porn fest your creepy neighbor has in his basement.
I also wondered what the experience was like and what—if anything—the participants would say to the cacophony of people watching them on the big screen. The anonymous filmmaker did not disappoint with their enthusiasm.
“Filming our submission for HUMP! was spur-of-the-moment. We decided two weeks before the deadline to set Saturday night aside and make a movie about a D&D—that’s Dungeons and Dragons for you folk and yes it’s quite a watch—orgy. We gathered some cameras, some lights, a whole bunch of friends and a whole bunch of good liquor. We set boundaries and worked hard to keep everyone feeling comfortable, and the whole experience ended up bringing us all closer together. We’d like to encourage anyone else who’s interested to just go for it and make their first HUMP! film!”
So if you’re still looking to add crazy things to your lifelong or just college bucket list, or if you have secret aspirations to be the next big thing—pun intended—on the dirty screen, grab your friends and start following the HUMP! fest to get a sexual awakening or re-education. Anyone can make a short film and participate and who knows, you might be debuting next year when it comes to Madison again.
And if you still need any more motivation and convincing, which I highly doubt by the way, I will drop some choice keywords that’ll fire up your imagination and curiosity for what this past HUMP! fest entailed and what they’ll bring in the future as well.
Like centaurs? I bet you’ve never quite thought of them this way before. Ever jumped on a trampoline before and gotten... let’s say urges? If ET made up your childhood, it’s time to meet ET as an adult now. Or how about time traveling to save the world and boinking? Yeah, you should be heading out to grab your Jabba the Hutt costume.
