Movie science makes absolutely no sense. This is a fact of life. In the sanitized labs of Hollywood, science is sexy, science is quick and science is terrifying. In reality, it is none of these things: It is indecorous, slow and about as scary as Biddy Martin's toy poodle. But you wouldn't get that impression from a movie like ""Splice,"" the new techno-horror flick from director Vincenzo Natali. Nope, in ""Splice,"" science is going to kill us all in very fast, sexy ways.
This speedy sexiness that is going to kill everybody comes in the form of Dren (Delphine Chanéac). Dren is a genetically spliced combination of several animal species combined with human DNA. She is created by hipster scientists Elsa (Sarah Polley) and Clive (Adrien Brody), two successful biochemists working to synthesize a life-saving protein. Initially, their research is limited to animals only, but when the impulsive Elsa rebels against her corporate overlords and expands into human research, Dren is the product. While she is originally seen as an experiment, eventually Dren becomes a daughter figure to Elsa and Clive. But, as it has been since Mary Shelley's ""Frankenstein,"" every cautionary science tale must have consequences.
The moralizing would be understandable if ""Splice"" seemed to be aiming at the right target. However, its melding of the corporate world and the scientific world never coalesces into a proper condemnation. The corporate suits are appropriately slimy and obsessed with the bottom line, but at no point is the business world ever a partner in the creation of the monstrosity that is Dren.
Thus, it seems that Natali's critical eye is aimed more at scientific curiosity itself—and in addition to this view already being overly paranoid, he undercuts his criticism by reverting to TV crime drama-style lab work. Elsa and Clive seemingly figure out how to meld human and animal DNA in a day or two, yet Natali would like the viewer to believe that this is a ridiculously long amount of time for scientific research. The sequence is even complemented with a music montage and flashy computer graphics. The whole scene is so similar to ""CSI"" you almost expect Brody to rip off his sunglasses, say a pithy one-liner and then cut to a theme song by The Who.
When he isn't trying to condemn the noble field that brought us vaccines, Pasteurization and the Jell-O pudding pops, Natali spends much of his time cursing motherhood. If the character of Elsa teaches us anything, it is that women are impulsive creatures, and when they have children they go bats-in-the-belfry insane. Elsa only operates at extremes: she either cares for Dren so passionately that it starts destroying those around her or she starts abusing and mutilating Dren in order to look out for her herself. Yep, that's motherhood for you. ""Splice"" very well might be the most detrimental movie to the feminist movement since, er, ""Sex in the City 2"" came out last week.
Natali's distracting 19th century beliefs are unfortunate, not just because they can at times be borderline offensive but because they take away from what could have been a great schlocky sci-fi thriller in the tradition of David Cronenberg. Between the grotesquely fascinating creature creations and some wonderfully twisted moments, including a terrarium that explodes in a burst of blood and mutated flesh, as well as two of the most warped sex scenes ever committed to film, ""Splice"" contains some delightfully unsettling moments. One thing Natali does do successfully is establish a steady dreadful tone, at least up until the final 10 minutes when the film devolves into a generic slasher flick. And Polley, Brody and Chanéac all turn in good performances, doing more with their characters than the script gives them. In pieces, ""Splice"" works quite well.
However, it could have worked well as a whole, too, if Natali had decided to focus more on the idea of what makes one human. Instead, it appears ""Splice"" was injected with a little too much misogynistic and anti-science DNA, creating something more akin to the freak of nature it depicts.
