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Thursday, March 28, 2024
Hit me baby, one more time

Erica Andrist

Spring break safety tips guaranteed to work!

I have been asked to put together a spring break safety column as we (well, you, since I will be plunked in Madison the whole time) depart for warm, relaxing locales. With a little help from Colleen Jameson at the ""No, Not You"" blog, I have assembled this list of spring break sexual assault prevention tips—guaranteed to work!

10. Don't put drugs in people's drinks in order to control their behavior.

While alcohol itself is the most commonly used date rape drug, any drug with sedative, amnesiac or other incapacitating effects may sometimes be used to assist a rapist in overpowering someone else. If you find yourself contemplating pharmaceutical coercion of another person, remember...

9. If you have sex with someone, make sure he or she is awake!

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In all 50 states, individuals who are unconscious are considered incapable of giving consent. Whether this unconsciousness results from alcohol, fatigue or your failure to adhere to tip #10, it is now impossible to have consensual sex with this person. Even if this person ""consented"" immediately before he or she passed out, recall consent may be affirmed or withdrawn at any time. If someone is unconscious, then he or she is not participating in this process. If you engage in sexual activity when someone is not capable of participating in this process, it is called sexual assault.

8. NEVER break open a door or climb through a window uninvited.

7. Be clear and honest about your intentions!

Consider telling someone you plan to assault him or her. If you don't communicate your intentions, the other person may incorrectly believe you do not plan to rape them. Note the verb: ""plan."" Rape is not about uncontrollable sexual impulse, or even about sex, period. According to years of research by David Lisak of UMass–Boston on rape, sexual assault and interpersonal violence, 1 in 16 college men affirmatively answers one or both of the following questions:

1.    Have you ever been in a situation where you tried, but for various reasons did not succeed, in having sexual intercourse with an adult by using or threatening to use physical force (twisting their arm, holding them down, etc.) if they did not cooperate?

2.    Have you ever had sexual intercourse with someone, even though they did not want to, because they were too intoxicated (on alcohol or drugs) to resist your sexual advances (e.g. removing their clothes)?

Of these 1 in 16, the average number of ""situations"" in which these men had found themselves was 5.8. None of these 1 in 16 are in jail. Nearly all of these 1 in 16 have committed multiple rapes.

What this means is: the vast majority of college sexual assaults are not random, innocent misunderstandings. They are not simple unfortunate miscommunications. They are not regrettable one-time mistakes. They are methodical assaults by a small, but extremely active and incredibly damaging group of predators. If you are a member of this group, consider communicating your predatory plans to others so they do not mistake you for a caring friend or respectful human being.

6. USE THE BUDDY SYSTEM! If you cannot be trusted to refrain from assaulting people, ask a friend to stay with you while you are in public.

Sexual assault can feel extremely isolating. If you are concerned you may harbor deep-seated power, control and/or anger issues that lead you to violate the rights of others, seek help from a trusted friend or professional.

5. Stay in well-lit areas! It is important for people to be aware of your presence, especially if you are planning to attempt to assault them.

4. Be sure not to confuse clothing, solitude, possession of condoms or sexy dance moves with consent!

Tight jeans are just jeans. Walking alone is just walking. Carrying condoms is just responsible. Sexy dancing is just dancing. It is very important not to infer anything about someone's receptivity to sexual intercourse with you based on anything other than a freely given, ""Yes, I am receptive to having sexual intercourse with you.""

3. Remember, nothing about your personal character permits you to have sex with someone against his or her will.

Of course you're an excellent student. Of course you do volunteer work. Of course you're involved in lots of student organizations. Of course you're active in your church. Of course you're a great athlete. Of course you are extremely good-looking. Without consent, it's still called rape.

2. Carry a whistle! If you have a rape whistle with you at all times, you can blow it if you are worried you might assault someone on accident.

1. Do not ever, EVER forget: If you have sex with someone without that someone's explicit permission—even if that someone has given permission in the past, even if that someone ""seemed like they totally wanted it,"" even if that someone didn't ""actually"" say no—you are committing a crime. That crime is called sexual assault.

Erica is a first-year medical student who believes primary prevention of sexual assault is vastly more effective and more important than risk-reduction strategies. Though she has provided all of the commentary for this column, she has borrowed some of the tips from ""Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work!"" at nonotyou.tumblr.com. For additional sexual assault resources, check out RAINN or the Rape Crisis Center hotline (608-251-RAPE), or email Erica at sex@dailycardinal.com with any of your questions.

 

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