At time of publication, it's all but completely official: as early as Friday, Conan O'Brien will be removed as the host of ""The Tonight Show"" on NBC. He makes room for former host Jay Leno, who could find no love for his new show or giant chin in prime time.
There are a myriad of explanations of the sad decision available in the media–Conan's supposedly slumping ratings, angry NBC affiliates demanding that Leno air his ratings-poisoning humor after local news programming or the flowering bromance between the billionaire comedian and top NBC exec Dick Ebersol. However, if we examine the history here, we see a grand conspiracy against Leno working behind the scenes of entire late-night blow-up.
1992: NBC chooses Jay Leno over David Letterman as the new host of ""The Tonight Show,"" igniting an embittered feud. A year later, Letterman leaves ""The Late Show"" for a new show on CBS to compete with Leno's Tonight Show. Conan takes up hosting duties in Letterman's place on ""Late Night.""
2004: Conan threatens to jump to another network if he isn't promised a better timeslot in the near future. NBC compromises by twisting Jay's arm into retiring in five years, handing host duties on ""The Tonight Show"" to the gangly redhead in 2009. Generation Y rejoices.
February 2009: Conan steps down. Jimmy Fallon is slotted to replace him, but only those who enjoy sketch comedians laughing uncontrollably during sketches are excited.
May 2009: Jay finally steps down. Conan appears as a guest so Jay can pass the torch. Not pictured is the pair wrestling over the actual torch during commercial break.
September 2009: Amidst fears that Leno's continued popularity could mean a competing show for the ""Tonight Show"" after Jay's ""retirement,"" NBC compromises by giving Jay a prime time slot nearly identical to his ""Tonight Show"" format. The show first airs a week before Conan assumes hosting the ""The Tonight Show.""
January 2010: Four months into the arrangement, NBC execs announce that neither show is performing as expected. NBC's solution: Move ""The Tonight Show"" to 11:00 for the first time since its inception, giving Jay a half hour before Conan to attract the baby boomers, then letting Conan pull in the 18-24 set afterward. Conan balked and refused to move his show, setting him on his current track to exit NBC altogether, likely for a new show on a to-be-determined network. Leno is presumed to take back ""The Tonight Show"" as soon as February.
And for a glorious week, late-night TV erupted into seething hatred as the public feud between Conan and NBC led every host to take satirical aim at one another. Conan blasted NBC execs for being morons. Leno blasted Conan for being a whiner. Letterman relished in backlash at Leno and NBC. Jimmy Kimmel stole a moment in the squabble by performing an entire show in a Leno impression. When Leno attempted to retaliate by having Kimmel on ""The Jay Leno Show,"" Kimmel proceeded to rip Jay to shreds on stage. And all the while, ratings for all the late night shows exploded, with Conan's show in particular finally (and ironically) rising to ratings expectations.
NBC has known it all along–Leno may be big, but berating and trashing him on air is bigger. This week was only the beginning: Leno's return to ""The Tonight Show"" will be marked by a triumphant walk on stage, only to be beaten to death by Conan on air. Emmy judges, make sure you are watching.
Yup, NBC has been engineering a brilliant conspiracy to sell ad time during the public beating of Jay Leno for quite some time. Or maybe they make terrible decisions and just screwed up royal. Only time will tell.
All kidding aside, Leno has plenty of fans, and good for them. But there's a special place in hell for those who support Jay Leno ousting Coco from ""The Tonight Show."" If you can send a retort, send it to mriechers@wisc.edu.
