UW-Madison seniors across campus Tuesday were nearly unanimous about the prospect of staying on for another year, with several pointing to the imminent collapse of the world financial system as a factor.
Many cited increasing evidence that a fifth year is all that stands between them and complete financial independence for the first and, considering the almost zero chance of landing a job, likely the last time in their lives.
""History classes, I mean I never really took all the history classes I wanted. Another year would really help with that. History... it has been going on for a long time,"" said senior chemical engineering major Josh Schmitter, as he passed a ""Going out of business"" sign on a local dumpling restaurant.
""Maybe art history, too,"" Schmitter added.
Several seniors said they hoped to gain a more rich and diverse college experience by extending their time at UW-Madison. Senior and English major Jennifer Colblume said she hoped to take more classes on farming her own food and other ""recession-proof"" jobs like ditch digging.
""I've never taken a class on modern dance either; I promised myself I would try one out,"" Colblume said, denying that an icy shiver ran down her spine as she watched the Dow Jones stock index drop over 200 points recently.
Colblume insisted her persistent weeping and rocking back and forth in the fetal position was actually dance practice. She then stared off into the corner for several minutes.
Experts on campus said it was common for some college seniors to express hesitancy about joining the workforce.
UW-Madison professor of sociology and public policy Ben Albert said he would be worried too if he had to sink into the suffocating black hole that is the labor market, from which no light can escape.
""Swoooooooosh,"" said Albert, making the sound of a toilet flushing and pantomiming a naïve senior being sent down the drain like so much human waste.
""Like a turd,"" he said.
