It seems to me that fantasy football is one of those things football fans are now obligated to do. It doesn't seem like we have a choice. ESPN has all those commercials for it. It's impossible to get on Yahoo! and um... research a paper without being bombarded by sign-ups for leagues. So, like a good football fan, I succumbed again this year. The guys in my house and a few extras signed up for a league on Yahoo!.
We missed the first week of the season because all of us had those papers, but when we finally got around to drafting, I realized why I really like this whole thing. There's camaraderie in it. You know, football with the guys, drinking beer, making crude jokes, farting. Oh yeah, and kicking your friends' asses on a weekly basis.
While I may enjoy fantasy football, I'm not necessarily good at it. I had to hold myself back from drafting Jim Sorgi, Brooks Bollinger and Lee Evans with my first three picks.
After wrestling with my inner demons, I made Donovan McNabb my first pick (No. 4 overall). Naturally, when he went down with a sports hernia as well as chest and groin injuries I realized I had broken a cardinal rule of fantasy drafting-never pick the guy on the cover of the new Madden football game. Fortunately for me, my Saturday night was filled with, um... joy from the Badger win, and I slept through most of Sunday. My roster was set with McNabb at the helm, and I rode his performance to a week three win. Madden curse avoided-for now.
I didn't conquer all my demons, however. One of my last picks in the draft was Lee Evans. But after three weeks and only two points, I had to face a decision. Could I cut the man who scored five touchdowns versus Michigan State? Could I cut one of UW's best receivers? After a long, hard look in the mirror and a good cry, I decided Lee had to go.
I then picked up Chad Pennington. I told you I'm not really that good at this.
I figured Chad and the New York Football Jets were on their way up. Chad decided to prove me wrong by tearing his rotator cuff and giving Brooks Bollinger the starting job. Thanks, Chad. (I knew I should have drafted Bollinger.)
After the Pennington fiasco (as the league now calls it), I decided to try and look at fantasy football with a more analytical eye. So there I was, searching for matchups, breaking down coverage schemes and checking the specs on the end line for the rotary... gurter.
I won't keep you in suspense. I made the finest fantasy football move in the history of fantasy football moves. It was glaring at me like a big fat Michigan fan. Green Bay at Carolina, Monday Night Football. I deftly maneuvered through the waiver wire and snatched up both Jake Delhomme and Stephen Davis. After 29 points from the pair, I was standing atop my rival in fantasy football glory.
Alright, maybe it's not that big of a deal to you, but it is to me. Seriously though, if you want some solid fantasy advice for this season, just take whoever is playing the Pack.
Connor is a junior lacking a major. Contact him at cgmcknight@wisc.edu.
