In between studying for midterms and apple picking, I have been keeping an eye out for the latest trends of the new school year. As you will come to find out, I am not impressed by most of them. Your assumptions are correct. I am the last person who should be reporting on trends, but too bad. When the fashion-mavens and style-watchers get their own columns, they can have at it. Until then, I will be playing dual roles.
First up: smoking. I doubt that the number of smokers on this campus has increased from this school year to last, but I am sure noticing it more. Where did all of you guys come from? Puffing on a cigarette on the way to class seems more popular than the O.C. at a sorority house. I'm not here to tell you to stop, because you're all adults and with the smoking ban, you've had a rough summer but out of the goodness of your overworked and tired hearts, please don't stand upwind from me while I'm walking up Bascom Hill. I need all the fresh oxygen I can get. Thanks
Back for a victory lap on the fashion scene are gaucho pants. I did some quick research on the gauchos. They are South American romanticized cattlemen. They are terrain-cruisin', rugged men who were also the stuff of tall tales back in the day. Yes, they wore loose baggy pants, but they were called Bombachas. I have an inkling the legendary gauchos' bombachas were not made of a rayon or linen, and were not worn with flip-flops.
I understand times change. But if we are going to adapt to these pants, let's call a spade a spade and dub them wide-leg capris. Don't like the term wide-leg? What, you don't have wide legs? Do you dislike being misrepresented? Now you know how the gauchos feel. So call the pants something else, or better yet, stop wearing them entirely. To the two of you who look good in them, I'm sorry. The rest of you, I'm doing you a favor.
Next trend of '05: Loud Music. I come to class now, and I can hear everyone's music, word for word, over my own. It's like we've given up on trying to be sensitive to our ears and each other and are just going full blast. I know this is all the rage now, but let's sway the trend and get it to stop. More often than not I do not want to hear your Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass remix by Butch Vig. You may like it, but everyone else hates it. Turn it down, or at least get better headphones.
The last trend I've had my eye on is drunken idiocy. This one is always in style on campus, but this year it seems more prevalent. The kids next door to me turned off the lights when the cops broke up their huge party. Tip: Darkness does not teleport you to a cop-free safe zone. It just angers them, they aren't fools and they can still hear all of you yelling, \Shhhhhhh"" at the top of your lungs. Here's to all of the drunken idiots out there are taking this ordinary fad, and making it extraordinary, especially for semi-sober spectators.
Keep your eyes peeled for more trends and hot new styles. And to those of you drunken-smokers wearing gaucho pants and listening to loud obnoxious music - I salute you for keeping up with the times.
Want to climb Bascom Hill with Erin? E-mail her at ejcanty8285@hotmail.com.
