I've come to believe that this world has become obsessed with failure-not simply the failures of others, but of our own individual failings. Seldom do I hear people rejoice over a success, especially a personal triumph. So I began to wonder exactly what it is that constitutes \failure"" and how have we begun to define it so casually?
As college students, we tend to feel defeated most often by grades and sub-par academic achievement. After high school, the instant gratification of complimentary teachers and counselors ceases and we become forced to evaluate ourselves through a system of letter grades. Viewed as self-sufficient adults, many in society assume we no longer need to receive assurance of our successes or meaningful insight into the areas we can improve. Compliments, in all reality, are something we need to hear daily, and our tendency to self-criticize makes us believe the encouragement from friends and family is no longer enough.
Lack of fulfillment in our student lives is often propelled by the fact that we track ourselves in pursuit of a mundane interest that fails to capture all that we are as people. I firmly believe we pit profession against passion as we aim to take courses that will further material wealth instead of personal fulfillment. Fear can be constituted as the trait that places us on the path to failure, and as long as we refuse to step out of the box, we will be doomed for demise.
A friend of mine recently suffered personal humiliation when her inability to keep up her grades led to a two-semester suspension from UW-Madison. While I hope never to suffer her fate, I can't help but feel a sense of understanding for her setback and the grief it has caused her. It is conceivable, however, that she had such an experience because she never truly believed in what she was doing. She had never completely settled on a path of study and therefore never put her heart and soul into the work.
Witnessing the downfall of my friend led me to a failure of my own-being unable to offer the comfort and advice she needed so desperately. It is funny how quick we are to turn away from a friend in need when we feel our own lives have taken a turn for the worse. It's no wonder we feel as inadequate as we do in knowing we had valuable counsel to offer.
We begin to adopt the problems of our acquaintances as our own, and when we fail to arrive at a solution, we damage our personal integrity as well. The pressure to ""do what is right"" leads to a feeling of inadequacy in what we believe should have been an easy way to succeed-in the eyes of our friends.
Unfortunately, as members of this society, we do not stop seeing ourselves as failures in the context of friendships, but in more intimate relationships as well. Especially in the case of young people like ourselves, life can become completely overshadowed by relationship failures. We ""fail"" to earn the same affection from someone we care about, ""fail"" to catch the eye of someone we find appealing and even ""fail"" to return a love that has been given so effortlessly to us. If we thought realistically, we'd understand that the chances of complete success in a relationship are slim to none but our imperfect selves strive for perfection.
Beyond the common areas of failure we all face, our despair can be highlighted if we fail in an area we had mastered. Often such an experience takes the form of an activity we enjoy most. Whether this is musical performance, athletic ability or any other hobby, failing here isn't seen as an option because we then feel as if we've exhausted all of our possibilities. Failing at what we've always been good at instills a fear beyond description.
In the words of Jeffrey J. Mayer, ""successful people aren't afraid of failure,"" so why are we all so prone to let failure stand in our way? Our largest misconception is that we face our troubles alone, when in fact so many are encountering the same issues. Through trial and error, learning from failures and overcoming symptoms of fear-success is indeed possible. So even if today has already promised not to go according to plan, realize it isn't that you've failed, but that you've simply lived.
Jessica Sprang is a sophomore majoring in journalism. Send comments to opinion@dailycardinal.com.
