Far too often lately in \The Long and Short of It"" I've donated an inordinate amount of space to lamenting the constant deluge of essays and exams that assail my daily life, while at the same time advising you to forget about your responsibilities and ""go have fun.""
I'll admit I need to lay off that ""I'm so busy, but you should go out and live your life"" shtick for a little while and write about something else-even though I sincerely believe that A) you shouldn't let the responsibilities of college life and the accompanying pressures control your entire being and B) you should enjoy your youth while you still can.
So this week, I've decided to write about the best movie currently out in theaters-that's right, the engaging and highly competent remake of George Romero's 1979 ""Dawn of the Dead.""
I've seen the new version twice now in the last two weeks, and I sincerely believe that ""Dawn of the Dead"" is a rousing triumph to filmmaking because it succeeds on a multiplicity of different levels. At its core, the film is a heart-pounding and entertaining diversion from the trappings of modern, zombie-free living. More profoundly, the movie raises some very serious and pressing questions about American society, namely, what would you do if everyone you ever knew turned into a zombie and everything you ever worked for and held dear was thrown straight out the window?
Each time I exited the theater after seeing the film, I pondered the current state of affairs in my life. Is my education really preparing me for life outside of college? Although they hold a high degree of relevance to me now, would the hours upon hours dedicated to studying subjects like history and English become utterly useless if and when the zombies attack?
My congratulations to all of you who've decided to shun the BA designation and pursue an education in engineering, chemistry, biology or medicine-you are the few whose university educations will be of some real use in a post-apocalyptic world overridden with zombies. The skills you are learning now will make you the toast of any zombie-infested town, from suturing massive jugular wounds to designing a makeshift automatic zombie decapitating machine.
To my fellow Letters & Science brethren, I'll just say that you had better take a CPR course A.S.A.P., because your vast knowledge of iambic pentameter and the Electoral College isn't going to amount to a darn thing when you're trapped in a room with 20 hungry zombies breathing down your neck. To those of you in law school... Well, let's just hope zombies don't end up replacing the living any time soon.
In the event a Dawn-like scenario actually occurs, I guess my experience in journalism would be useful if the zombie population was eventually contained and there emerged a demand for a weekly newsletter. Concurrently, my schooling in history may come in handy when telling stories of ""BZ"" American life (Before Zombies).
Other than these most remote of possibilities, I think my education would do little good if faced with the constant threat of millions of flesh-devouring undead stalking me every minute of every day.
I suppose it's time to enroll in that hunter's safety class I hear so much about...
