Anyone who finds themselves in need of a good chuckle on a lazy afternoon will love \Consumer Joe-Harassing Corporate America, One Letter at a Time.""
In ""Consumer Joe,"" author Paul Davidson, using the craftily concocted pseudonym of David Paulson, writes to several major corporations with inane questions and comments, and receives answers with surprising frequency.
For example, he writes to Minute Maid and suggests an all-pulp orange juice for the pulp lovers like himself. In reply, Paulson receives a standard thank-you-for-contacting-us letter, along with a 50-cent coupon towards his next purchase of a Minute Maid product. He then writes a surly letter to higher-ups in the company, complaining that the woman who replied to his letter was trying to steal his idea.
In another letter, he writes to the corporate headquarters of Circle K with a long, complicated story about how he is an officer in a ""Circle K fan club,"" and how he wants a flag with the company logo on it. The company actually special- orders a flag and sends it to him.
Other enjoyable letters are the ones to Coca-Cola bottling companies, asking for information about what happened to all the bottles of ""Coke II"" that were never sold, and a letter to corporate headquarters at Best Buy, ostensibly written while he was on hold for over two hours at a Best Buy Store.
As a follow up to that letter he writes another one saying the service was great when he finally got it, and asks that nobody gets in trouble because of his letter of complaint. The company tells him they cannot release that information, eliciting another letter from Paulson, now in regards to this policy.
Another letter that was particularly funny is the one he writes to Cedar Point Amusement Parks, telling them he has a mini toy poodle named Jack Tricks, who has a ""need for speed."" Paulson attempts to convince park employees to let him take his dog on a roller coaster while strapped to a special harness he has created. Unfortunately, the park writes to tell him this would not be possible.
It seems no corporation is safe from David Paulson's correspondence. Krispy Kreme doughnuts, Procter & Gamble, McCormick & Company, Six Flags Theme Parks, Wrigley's, Rubbermaid, Starbucks and dozens of other large companies all receive-and usually reply-to these wildly absurd letters of Paulson's.
The best part is that the corporations always treat his silly complaints, comments and ramblings with the utmost deference and reply with completely serious answers.
For example, Ben & Jerry's ice cream replies to his letter stating, ""Thank you very much for contacting us. It was nice to hear from you. We're sorry to hear that you are seeing a psychologist because you haven't heard from us about your flavor suggestion...""
The only problem the book might have is that the humor, while funny the first time, will probably not stand up to the test of time. Upon first reading, the letters are great, but over time, they lose that edge and begin to seem like mundane ramblings from someone who has nothing better to do with his time.
But whether the humor diminishes with repeated readings, there is an added bonus to this book. Several companies send Paulson ""freebies,"" which is helpful information to any student on a budget.
-""Consumer Joe"" is published by Broadway Books.
