It's that time of year again.
No, not opening day. Not the last day of school. Not even that one special day of the year when the Herald's uninspired attempt to produce a periodical actually resembles a newspaper.
Instead it is the glorious day when the Cardinal will once again prove its dominance, not just as a newspaper, but as a sports machine. Today's Cardinal-Herald softballgame will take place at Vilas Park and first pitch is scheduled for 3:30 p.m.
Questions have arisen as to whether the Herald will have enough players on their roster as most of their staff has spent recent weeks correcting further inaccuracies regarding stories , especially those dealing with the Russian \Father of Genetics.""
Making matters worse for the less Herald-ed newspaper, Lee Ironside has a photo shoot outside of the Kohl Center that he can't get out of, and might miss the first pitch. Expect his hair to be gelled to its usual preciseness, but don't expect anything precise from his hitting or fielding (or writing for that matter). Mike ""Babyface"" Giefer, the team's mascot, is a spark plug on the sidelines, but he needs to be home by 5:30 p.m. One of the few bright spots for the Herald is that after increased demand from UW students and fellow Herald staffers, Editor in Chief Lars Russell will finally be leaving.
Headlining today's game will be Brian ""I will once again drink Lars Russell under the table"" Lauvray and Leif ""I hope Stacy Hicklin doesn't beat me again"" Griffin. Cary ""The best journalist from Sellery 3A"" Dohman and Arvind ""I am going bald but it's OK"" Gopalratnam are being called up. Manager Joe ""Dagwood Master"" Potente has announced this will be his last game.