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The Daily Cardinal Est. 1892
Sunday, October 01, 2023

Sports page soundtrack

This time of exams and mounting homework has really hampered my ability to check in with SportsCenter lately. If school has bogged you down too, I feel your pain. 




Here is a recap of 10 recent headlines with a twist. Take a look at the top 10 singles in Billboard Hot 100 and the sports story that accompanies each one. 






A guy snagged Arizona slugger Luis Gonzalez's discarded chewing gum in spring training and is auctioning it off on the Internet to raise money for a high school sports program in Minnesota. I cannot figure out if this guy is a genius or a lunatic. Obviously he guessed correctly that oddballs would bid on such an item. The most recent bid was $3,275. 


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Indians pitcher Chuck Finley is not so sure anymore. His wife, actress Tawny Kitaen, was recently arrested on charges of spousal abuse and battery after kicking him and \twisting his ear"" during an argument while he was driving. I'm guessing high heels here. Ouch. 






I know I cannot blame George Karl for all Milwaukee's injuries this year, but I do hold him responsible for the Anthony Mason signing. Karl was the driving force behind this ""square peg in a round hole"" acquisition. Mason obviously does not fit in and now the Bucks are in danger of falling out of the playoffs entirely, winning only three of their last 10 games. 






I am not sure it really matters who is in charge of the Detroit Tigers. They are just going to be bad for a few years. But more power to team president Dave Dombrowski for firing Detroit's general manager and manager, Phil Garner, Monday, after starting the season with six straight losses. 






All NBA players not named Chris Webber are singing this tune with hopes of stealing Tyra Banks away from Sacramento's superstar forward. Only a last ditch attempt like this could distract Webber enough to keep Sacramento from earning home-court advantage in the West. The chances of this succeeding are about as good as the Kings' chances of reaching the finals. 






New Tampa Bay Head Coach Jon Gruden has been cold and distant at NFL pre-draft combines, not communicating at all with his former Oakland assistants. Rest assured he will not call to wish owner Al Davis good luck at the draft, which starts April 20. 






Nothing has been more blurry than the Eastern Conference playoff picture. Detroit earned a surprise Central Division title'via its old Bad Boy uniforms'and the Wizards are still in the hunt.  




But the real race is between the Vince Carter-less Raptors and the young Pacers for the eighth seed. 






Let's call it an ode to Ken Griffey Jr. ""Oops, there goes his knee, he drops to his feet. Oh my."" Although he has ruled out season-ending surgery to fix his latest ailment, Griffey is inching closer to the fine line between ""hard times"" and having a great career end abruptly in its prime. Junior has already missed over 60 games to injury the past two seasons. 






Barry Bonds wasted no time in reminding how good he is at baseball. He did it with home runs 'five in his first 11 at-bats to be exact. He had 11 RBIs in that span and is currently batting .538. Last season was no fluke. (Random Rant of the Week: Can anyone tell me how this song is still around? It's atrocious. Can someone in ""the biz"" explain this to me?) 






This song goes out to all the college underclassmen and high school students to declare themselves eligible for the NBA draft in the coming weeks. In exchange for a new house, their mothers promise to follow the youngsters to any NBA city and make them home-cooked meals.

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