The popular image of Internet romance is that of two lonely and socially inept people typing remarkably improbable things to each other over a chat service of some sort, or the online intrigue in which Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan got involved in the film \You've Got Mail."" However, Internet personal ads, like their newspaper-based counterparts, focus on getting people together in real life.
The services generally request users to fill out a form giving their gender, orientation, basic physical data like height and weight and some questions designed to match you with other users. They also usually provide an opportunity to post a picture, an area for additional comments about oneself, and a description of the people one wants to meet. Personals providers generally charge no fee to post an ad, but there might be one to respond.
One advantage of Internet personals is the ability to search by all this information. For example, you could say that you want to meet men aged between 19 and 22 within five miles of Madison who like music. Of course, the sites return fewer hits for more specific queries.
Another advantage is that ability to chat over the Internet before meeting in person, possibly saving the trouble, expense and awkwardness of meeting in person with a person who is uninteresting or just not right.
UW students' attitudes about the medium were generally skeptical or derisive.
""I'm not sure I'd be able to meet someone I'd like,"" one senior said.
""My roommates have looked at them a little bit. We found some funny ones,"" said another student, a junior.
Not everyone is as doubtful, however.
""They can be great anonymous ways to meet people with similar interests you'd not have otherwise met ... but there's still no substitute for going out and meeting people in real life,"" one senior said.
Let's take a look at a few of the more popular Internet personals services.
Yahoo, perhaps the most successful Web portal site, includes such a service. It's free to post ads, but responding requires a membership. The site allows users to create multiple identities, in case they want to meet several different types of people or expose different facets of their personalities. Each identity has its own mailbox, separate from the rest of user's account. The service is available to you.
CollegeClub, a Web site that provides information, news and services to college students, runs a service called Match U. Not surprisingly, the users tend overwhelmingly to be students or recent graduates. It provides a long, detailed questionnaire, which few users fill out in full. Still, the site attracts a large volume of people and has many users in the Madison area. The service is available on CollegeClub's Web site. Posting and replying is free.
Nerve, a self-described ""smart, honest magazine on sex,"" has a personals service. Attractions here include a large user base and a very specific set of forms, including quirky questions like ""____ is sexy, _____ is sexier.""
The site uses a credit system, where one credit buys the ability to respond to one ad. (Credits are also used in the site's chat component, called the ""Instant Gratifier."") The cost of credits ranges from 40 to 80 cents, depending on the amount purchased. Posting an ad and replying to responses recieved is free; the site also supports a multiple identity system similar to Yahoo's.
Of course, if you decide to dip into the world of Internet personals, be sure to play safe'go by your first name only, or a false one, don't post your phone number or primary email address, and arrange to meet in a public place like a coffeeshop or restaurant. If you like, you can have a friend come along and keep an eye on the proceedings from across the room, allowing you to suddenly ""recognize"" him or her and make a quick exit if necessary.
Currently, most of the users of Internet personal ads are male, reflecting the situation in their print media analogs. However, more and more women are using the services every day. There are also more specialized services, aimed at groups ranging from the LGBT community to particular ethnic groups, and from members of various religions to ""computer geeks.""
Internet personals might not be a match made in heaven, but they're definitely an option worth checking out. With a little care and effort, they can be a gateway to a new world of interesting people.
