Maintaining and growing intimacy in a long-term relationship can be difficult when two people get very comfortable with each other and have a lot of history that impacts their current thoughts and feelings. Often in long-term relationships, the individuals within the relationship get resistant to change, insisting the other should be the one showing more effort. They each hold out, waiting for the other to prove their love. This creates a tense dynamic that is not conducive to intimacy and growth.
Despite these potential problems, there is hope for long-term relationships. Here are three ways to increase intimacy in a long-term relationship.
1. Proactively seek to please each other.
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Often, individuals within a couple want to be pleased. They want their needs met, and an imbalance is created as each seeks to have their own needs met. However, when each individual in a couple is actively seeking to meet their partner's needs, they will each be far more satisfied. The longer people are together, the more mundane their sex life can become. The older people get, the more problems they may experience in their sex life. Lubricant, sex toys, waxes, and massage oil are all things that can help increase intimacy and improve sensation and arousal. Vaginal dryness is a common problem for women as they age and is not a reflection of their arousal. However, this can create awkward situations when assumptions are made about desire.
There are CBD products that can help with vaginal dryness. They can be used during foreplay to decrease discomfort, increase sensation, and create a more relaxing environment that is more conducive to orgasms. This is one of the many benefits of CBD, and you can find reviews for the best CBD lubricant on websites like American Marijuana, which provides everything you need to know about CBD products.
2. Focus on growing as a couple.
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Sometimes, a couple needs professional help to increase positive communication and grow together. An Affair of the Heart offers couples therapy retreats, which provide a unique opportunity for couples to focus on their relationship without the distraction of everyday life. Sometimes, it can be the emotional disconnect that is causing sexual difficulties.
A couple's sex life extends their emotional connection to each other. The emotional connection allows couples to increase intimacy without fear or reservation. It can feel impossible to talk about sex toys, lubricants, or sexual discomfort if you already have strained communication. If you aren't comfortable with the person you're with, foreplay won't be relaxing, and you'll have a more challenging time reaching orgasm.
3. Don't make assumptions.
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Too often, people make assumptions about what their partner is thinking or how they are feeling. For example, when a man is having a hard time with arousal, his partner may assume it is due to a decrease in attraction. This will negatively impact his partner's arousal and increase discomfort. Making assumptions can destroy intimacy and ruin your sex life. In reality, arousal can be affected by age, testosterone levels, menopause, medications, overall sexual wellness, and the pH balance of the vagina. Many physical and emotional reasons have nothing to do with attraction.
In conclusion, a long-term relationship takes work and dedication from both partners. One person cannot fix their entire relationship on their own. They can take the initiative and be proactive, but their partner has to be open to the change. Both individuals have to want that deeper relationship for it to thrive. This isn't just about having more or better sex: It's about creating a relationship where both partners feel fulfilled sexually and emotionally.
