Local Facebook mom goes viral after posting Langdon Bid Day woes

Linda Johnson anxiously checks her Facebook page for likes and comments from her almost middle-aged female friends.

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Ah, Bid Day. Hordes of sorority sisters traveling, speaking, singing and dancing in impenetrable packs — what’s so scary about that? 

However, the glory of the over-enthusiastic and estrogen-fueled Bid Day for campus  sororities was less than enjoyable for Linda Johnson, a concerned mother, essential oils dealer, organic tomato grower and avid Facebook user. 

The startling coordinated stomps, shrieks, and screams urged Linda to turn to her favorite social media platform to rant about her horrendous experience. 

“I didn’t know it was possible for teenage girls to act like that…they were animals… I felt like I was watching a combination of a mating ritual and a sacrifice to one of their ancient gods…” Linda stated in her third outraged post, which got over 10,000 likes.

“I was too focused during my hourly meditation walk… I didn’t want to end up in that place… I don’t ever want to go back…”

Linda isn’t the only person concerned for the sanity of Greek Life participants, as many of the more wholesome students had equally traumatizing experiences.

Other accounts included high-pitched and indistinguishable chanting, ceremonial dances involving large metal poles as props, and embroidery of the Greek alphabet directly into the skin of new pledges. 

While the university has been strict with hazing rituals within the Greek system, the new pledges don’t think of this cult-like behavior as concerning or harmful.

“I BREATHE FOR ALPHA GAMMA OMEGA PHI CHI DELTA. I WOULD DIE FOR MY SISTERS!!!” yelled Sarah Adams (we think she went partially deaf from all of the screaming and can no longer hear herself), who incidentally is “living her best life” now that she is a freshman in college. 

Hearing the joy and feelings of belonging in the voice of students like Sarah is almost enough to excuse the Greek community for their obnoxious behavior during the rush season; it’s almost too bad we also should overlook the binge drinking, drug abuse, sexual assault, and unhealthy expectations and pressure on students! 

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