Gather ‘round folks, and I shall spin you a yarn. It’s a mighty tale that I’ve to tell. A tale of men. A tale of movies. A tale standing taller than the mightiest oak in the forest. A legend, more accurately—a legend about roller disco.
You see, there was a time in our great country when the idea of strapping wheels to your feet and moving across a hardwood floor to disco tunes had some considerable popularity. And so, as is the way of such things, eventually a film had to be made to chronicle and capitalize on this phenomenon.
It’s here where our story gets interesting. It’s here, my friends, that the Legend of Skatetown begins. You see, among what I can only assume were scores of roller disco films being made stands the seminal work: “Skatetown, U.S.A.”
You see, “Skatetown, U.S.A.” is not like other films. Like any other film. The film features a cast of failed stand-up comedians and washed-up TV talent including Scott Baio, Marsha Brady (probably not her real name?) and the first ever cinematic role of a young Patrick Swayze. “Skatetown” also includes multiple, extended, un-plot-related roller disco performances and two separate performances by Traffic frontman Dave Mason.
So here’s the thing. Aside from Dave Mason, the film features one of the greatest disco soundtracks ever—The Jackson 5, Earth Wind & Fire and a version of “Under My Thumb” from The Hounds that sounds like it was done by a 1960s Daft Punk. It’s remarkable. And it was incredibly expensive to license.
So expensive, in fact, and the film was such a tremendous flop upon its release—due in no small part to the fact it’s batshit insane—the music was never licensed for a home release. So this gorgeous gem of cinematic glory and weirdness aired maybe three times on broadcast during the ’70s and ’80s, and then disappeared from circulation save for a few 35mm film prints still floating around.
I tell this story for two reasons. First, to get the word out about “Skatetown” in the hopes we can get a groundswell movement going and maybe pressure Sony into actually releasing it. But second, to demonstrate the importance of stories ABOUT stories, not just the stories themselves.
See, I’ve seen “Skatetown, U.S.A.” It’s breathtaking. It’s remarkable. It’s one of my favorite films ever, and short of the handful of prints and an even smaller handful of technology-defying torrents, there just isn’t a possible way for people to see it.
And while I’m very happy I have seen it, there’s a small part of me that wishes it still held that mythic, unattainable status. That it was still forbidden fruit I couldn’t quite reach. Somehow, the legend surrounding the film was almost worth more to me than the film itself.
To take a more recent example, we can look at “Escape from Tomorrow,” a semi-surreal horror flick shot almost entirely in Disney World and on the sly without the permission of Disney or its staff. It screened at Sundance Film Festival last January, and the fear it wouldn’t be able to attain actual distribution began to spread.
Ultimately it did score a release, and has been/will be shown in theaters across America. I saw it with a friend, and while we disagreed about the quality of the film, we agreed on one thing: We both would have been happier if we hadn’t seen it. In fact, we agreed we’d rather it hadn’t gotten distribution at all.
Somehow, the idea of the secret horror film from Disney that screened once and then disappeared was more meaningful, more important to us, than the film itself. The story of the story meant more than the story itself, like the legend of Johnny Appleseed outgrowing whatever weird person it was originally based on.
Our stories take on lives of their own, they take on their own meaning, they grow and they can die. This is what movies are: storytelling, in a way that will hopefully never die. And sometimes, like legends outstripping their heroes, films can be outgrown by their own myths. This doesn’t cheapen them. Nothing could cheapen the experience of “Skatetown.”
But nothing can destroy it either. Through our stories we make things immortal, people and pictures the same. Maybe no one who reads this will actually see “Skatetown, U.S.A.” in its full glory. But they’ll know the legend, and it’ll live on because of that.
And once more quickly, this weekend is Reel Love Film Festival, LGBTQ advocacy and community support, The Marquee theater, schedule is at wudfilm.com/reellove. You really should go.
How do you feel about the essence of a film’s story versus the actual film itself? Email Austin at wellens@wisc.edu.
