I hate work. I'm a lazy, worthless sack of crap, especially when I haven't had my morning cup of frosting. Just the thought of homework some nights is enough to make me consider dropping out and getting a job at McDonald's, so I wouldn't have to put in the mental and emotional investment required to actually learn shit.
While the thought of working underneath the Golden Arches for the rest of my life isn't the most appealing thought in the world (although I do love me some McNuggets), I'm beginning to think there would be some pretty incredible perks.
Sure, it's probably completely mindless and boring as hell, but think about it: You show up, make a few hundred Big Macs without using your brain, and you're done.
You can go home to your life without one thought of work for the rest of the day.
School days, on the other hand, last 24 hours. You go to classes, take vigorous notes and do your best to focus on whatever subject your professor seems so fascinated with.
When your classes for the day are done, you are most definitely not. Instead of calling it a day and rewarding yourself with a cold beer and some delicious cashews, you have to keep on truckin' with homework. You keep studying until you're so delirious from sleep deprivation that you keep repeating the same word over and over again until it starts to sound made up. Even sleep is just another thing you have to fit into your schedule, right between eating four cosmic brownies for stress relief and that cup of frosting everyone needs to get going in the morning (maybe the frosting thing is just me).
After years of dealing with the daily grind and the never-ending reality of arduous mental labor, the thought of being able to form a barrier between my work life and normal life is refreshing. So refreshing at times that I seriously think about dropping out. By no means do I plan on dropping out tomorrow to make delicious albeit incredibly unhealthy food, but the lifestyle and mindset that a job like that brings is interesting to consider and surprisingly tempting.
Is this constant workflow never going to end? After my time here, I'll potentially move on to grad school, and after that, I'm in the real world (!). I'll flip shit if I end up with a job that requires 60 hour work weeks and enough stress every day to frazzle even the most collected of souls.
Which brings me to the question: Is all of this work worth it? The freak-out/hyperventilation moments, eight-hour study marathons and complete lack of a social life save Friday and Saturday nights?
Of course the answer is yes. Otherwise, everyone would have abandoned college by now in favor of something a little more easygoing. But sometimes I just can't help but wonder if my life would be better spent simply getting by flipping burgers instead suffering through the never-ending cycle of hard work and cutthroat competition.
Contemplating joining Elliot and applying at McDonald's so you can dodge your dreaded mid-terms? E-mail Elliot at ejmorris2@wisc.edu and fill out an application together.
