The President gave the State of the Union address Tuesday night. Similar to many, a running commentary ensued between those who watched. This is just one such commentary.
Bush: Thank you all.
E: What the hell is that supposed to mean!?!?
J: Calm down, he was just saying hello. Are you going to be like this the entire time?
E: Up yours.
Bush: Dictatorships ... feed resentment and radicalism, and seek weapons of mass destruction.
E: So he's admitting that he's a dictator.
J: What are you talking about?
E: I seem to remember a strong argument for invading Iraq being to seek WMDs.
J: Eh, it's a stretch but I'll give it to you.
Bush: ... Americans believe in the God-given dignity and worth of a villager with HIV/AIDS, or an infant with malaria, or a refugee fleeing genocide or a young girl sold into slavery.
E: Oh man, did he just say what I think he said?
J: Um, what exactly do you think he said?
E: He just said Americans know the value of a young girl sold into slavery. I guess he's right. What? Isn't that like two camels or something?
J: You're going to hell.
Bush: Congress did not act last year on my proposal to save Social Security (Democrats applaud), yet the rising cost of entitlements is a problem that is not going away (Republicans applaud).
E: What is this, are they doing the wave?
J: So much for bipartisan civility.
Bush: With open markets and a level playing field, no one can out-produce or out-compete the American worker.
E: Well, except China, India, Taiwan and all the various sweatshops around the world.
Bush: America is addicted to oil ... make our dependence on Middle Eastern oil a thing of the past.
E: Who is this guy and where did the President go?
J: Hey, he's agreeing with your stance, listen and be happy.
E: Aarrrgg! My allegations. Noooo!
Bush: Tonight I ask you to pass legislation to prohibit ... creating human-animal hybrids.
E: There go my hopes to bring 'X-Men' to Broadway.
Bush: And so we move forward'optimistic about our country, faithful to its cause and confident of the victories to come. May God bless America.
J: Good speech, if not sometimes defensive, but progressive in areas I didn't expect. I give it a seven out of 10 stars.
E: It could've been worse, and he showed some thought in new directions. But the fact that 25 minutes of the hour-long address was nothing but clapping is gonna hurt the score.
J: You timed it?
E: Yes, yes I did. Anyways, I give it one-and-a-half thumbs up and a sidelong glance of curiosity and skepticism.
