We don't have bad hygiene, there's just no time to shower / It's hard to stay awake when sleep lasts for one hour / If we had the time, we'd get better grades / But we sure do go out, though we don't get paid / If our office had windows, we might have a tan / We'll eat three meals a day now, because we can / We work hard all night to put out great stories / And have many football and softball glories.
Though we'll all miss the paper we know and love / We'll be happy to leave for the reasons above.
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