The end of the year is upon all of us once again and with it come the fears and anxieties of a new year. All the way back in 1999, the fear was related to the Y2K bug. In preparation for the apocalypse after what was sure to be a technological breakdown, I consumed voluminous amounts of tequila and rum and found, or rather \unfound,"" myself unconscious on a hotel bathroom floor in Austin, Texas.
But for those sparkling 75 minutes between when lady alcohol first kissed my lips and when I collapsed from inebriation and lady alcohol found a more willing partner, the night was perfect. And that's what New Year's Eve is all about: The perfect balance of blissful unawareness of the year to come, combined with the expectation of drinking away the demons that have hounded one for the previous year.
Anything can still happen in 2004: George W. Bush could be ousted from the White House. I could still graduate in May. And Paris Hilton could become a nun. But for 2003 the jig is up, come 11:59.59 p.m. Dec. 31.
If you are inclined to root for the Badgers from the stands, head due south on Interstate 74 until you reach Nashville, Tenn. Once in Nashville, watch the Badgers play Auburn University. Then-win, lose or draw-drag yourself to a bar that has a mechanical bull.
Drink way too much of anything with a proof higher than 80 and try to stay on the mechanical bull as long as possible. If your budget is too small and you cannot afford to go anywhere, stay in Madtown and throw a party or go out to the bars. My advice is to go out to a grocery store and buy some cheap brew such as ""Hi-Brau"" and consume. Following that, go out to the bars. And as an added bonus, you'll discover that bartime is six in the morning on New Year's Eve.
One cautionary tale is to be ever-so-careful of the glassware on New Year's Eve. Last year, I found myself at a bar that strangely enough had free champagne and former mayor of Madison Sue Bauman inside. Aside from getting photos of myself taken with the former mayor and her dork-ass husband I also knocked over five crystal champagne glasses. The bartender and the owner of the bar were none too happy and refused to hear my complaint of the table being unlevel and ""wobbly."" As they escorted me out of the bar, they explained that I was the only one that was ""wobbly."" Right.
So when you, gentle reader, embrace the New Year's Eve- whether it be in Indiana with family, in Nashville celebrating a Badger bowl victory with Alex Lewis and Lee Evans or in Madison breaking champagne glasses and breaking hearts with abandon, make sure to do it with passion.
bllauvray@wisc.edu.
