Bucky Badger fed up, leaves game early

After a total of 259 push-ups last Saturday, Alan Johnson threw down his Bucky Badger mask in disgust and left the field.

Image By: Gage Meyer

Sophomore Alan Johnson, the man in the Bucky Badger suit, took off the mascot head and threw it down in disgust upon completing his 54th push-up after Wisconsin’s final touchdown Saturday.  

He then proceeded to storm out of the stadium to loud boos from the Badger faithful. 

“Fuck this shit,” Johnson told The Daily Cardinal. “Everybody told me they weren’t going to score much this year, and then I’m out here in this hot suit doing 54 push-ups. Nope. I’m out.” 

Badger fans were incredulous the moment Johnson ripped the Bucky head off. An unprecedented act of defiance, most were left with their mouths agape. Kids were seen crying in their mothers’ arms upon learning that Bucky wasn’t real. 

“That guy is a dick,” said five-year-old Erica Mueller. 

Added her father, Jim: “If that guy wants to meet me out in the parking lot, I’m all for it. Ruined my little daughter’s day. I mean, it’s almost as bad as if she found out Santa wasn’t real.” 

Erica, who was still in her father’s lap at that point, burst into tears yet again after her father’s slip-up. 

“Son of a bitch,” said Jim. 

The student section, usually known for being classy and respectful, broke into a deafening “Asshole” chant after Johnson’s stunt. 

“Well, the guy, I mean [unintelligible slurred words]. Just dumb, man,” said Mark Rogers, a sophomore who was completely plastered. 

Despite the outpouring of criticism directed his way, Johnson maintained his stance and defended his actions. He knew exactly what the job entailed and was aware of the physical demands of the job. However, when he was actually called to do what he signed up for, it was simply too much.

“Even though they told me I might end up doing 60-plus push-ups at a game, I didn’t really believe them,” Johnson said. “And then they named Bart [Houston] the starting quarterback. I mean, come on, can you blame me for having low expectations?” 

At press time, Johnson was reportedly thinking about transferring schools after even his roommates berated him for his actions, calling him a “pathetic excuse for a human being.” 

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