Super Woke student ensures all of social media is aware of her wokeness

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“I just really want to be an inspiration for all girls that will follow in my footsteps,” UW student Sarah Johnson triumphantly captioned her most recent photo of her and her ridiculously hot friends at the Women’s March.

“A lot of people say that I just wanted an excuse to post a picture of myself in only nipple tassels, but that is not what this is about. This is about equality!” she stated when questioned about her motives.

You can see it on her filter-filled Instagram: Sarah is frickin’ woke. It is filled with captions about her perceived quirkiness, acai bowls, vegan tacos, green smoothies, “shelter” dogs and an abundance of photos whenever there is any form of social uprising. It is needless to say that her 2,376 followers always know which social justice bandwagon is the most necessary to hop on. Pride festivals, pro-choice rallies and anti-gun walk-outs, our gal has documented it all with her perfect hair and toned stomach! She loves to wear Madewell, cover her various Hydroflasks with four dollars apiece RedBubble stickers about feminism and the environment, and listens to a blend of Chance the Rapper and Taylor Swift: She is the face of our progressive generation!

“I really look up to her, you know, being so open about her totally non-mainstream political views on social media. I mean, she even retweeted a demeaning tweet about Trump! One day, I aspire to have the confidence to do that,” replied one of her sorority sisters that managed to make an appearance in 97 of Sarah’s 392 color-coordinated Instagram posts.

While she may only be a single outspoken and empowered young woman, her gifts to her followers, and ultimately the world, will live on for generations.

With the potential for increasing numbers of outspoken youth, we can only hope that intersectionality, racial disparities and actual environmental conservation can make the cut!

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